Back Where He Belongs
by CandC1988
Summary: TJ goes back to his hometown in his senior year to find that everybody and everything has changed. But, TJ has a secret of his own.
1. The Gift of Life & the Sadness of Death

Disclaimer: I do not own Recess or any of its characters.

Prologue

The Gift of Life & The Sadness of Death

He quickly rushed his girlfriend to the hospital. He couldn't believe it! He was about to be a father. A father of twins. He was a little nervous, but he knew with his beautiful girlfriend by his side that he could accomplish anything.

When they got to the hospital a receptionist pointed them in the direction of a room. She had a very bored expression on her face, as if she was in a job that she couldn't wait to get out of. He couldn't understand how anybody could not truly be happy in a job that helped bring many people into this world. Any job that helped do that he knew he would be happy in.

Lane looked up at her boyfriend. She knew he was scared about this whole thing. That he thought he wasn't ready to be a father, but he didn't know that she wasn't ready to be a mother. She didn't think she was going to survive through the birth of her what was sure to be beautiful twins, but she didn't want to worry her boyfriend.

The doctor came into the room a few minutes later, first asking how far apart the contractions were. When they answered the doctor said they probably had a few hours to wait until their babies were born. Lane asked her boyfriend to go and get her some ice chips. The doctor looked seriously at her for a moment.

"You don't think you're going to make it through this do you?" the doctor asked her quietly. Lane shook her head quietly.

"I .., I just, I don't want to leave him like this," Lane said quietly, "I know he's not ready to handle it on his own."

The doctor patted her on the shoulder. She wanted to hear the doctor say that it was okay. That she was going to make it through, but instead he said, "It's going to be okay. Most boyfriends don't even see the pregnancy through."

"You don't think I'm going to make it either," Lane accused the doctor. The doctor just looked away. It pained him too much to tell the truth. Lane was about to speak again, demanding him to tell her what he knew. What he thought he knew. Suddenly, her boyfriend came back, holding ice chips in a cup.

* * *

Three hours later Lane was in labor. Her boyfriend felt as if his hand was going to fall off as she squeezed his hand for support. But, when he nearly fainted the doctors told him he was going to have to leave the room so as not to disturb his girlfriend while she was pregnant.

He paced back and forth in the hallway as his babies were being born. He berated himself for not being able to be there when the birth took place. When he looked up both his and her parents were rushing through the doors, he didn't know how it took them three hours to get there, but they were here now. And that was all that mattered.

"Where is she?" his girlfriend's mom asked wildly. He gently put an arm around her.

"She is in labor right now," he said soothingly, then admitted, ashamed, "They kicked me out. I almost fainted."

"It is okay honey," his mom said, in the same soothing voice he had just used, also putting an arm around him, "We understand. Your dad was not in the room when you were born either."

"But I wanted so bad to be there for her," he protested.

Nobody else just said anything, just lent him there silent support.

* * *

"Sir?" somebody behind him timidly said. He turned around to see the doctor standing behind me. He looked at the doctor expectantly, expecting him to say something. Anything. Tell him Lane was okay. Tell him his babies were okay, "Something went wrong."

"Are the babies okay?" he asked, horror filling his voice.

"The babies are fine," the doctor said, in a soothing tone that said expect the worst next, "But there's been some complications with Lane. She died after the second baby was born."

"What?" Lane's mom said as her husband pulled her close.

He tuned them out. He couldn't stand this. He was a fifteen year old boy for Christ's sakes. She was a sixteen year old girl. She hadn't deserved to die yet. And he couldn't raise two kids by himself. Fifteen year old TJ Detweiler was in for the first major challenge of his life.

* * *

"We are gathered here today to mourn the loss of a loved one, Lane Amanda McCarty ..," the preacher started as TJ attended the funeral. He tuned the preacher out. He wasn't ready to hear all this. He would never be ready to hear all this. He had known Lane since he had moved to Texas when he was twelve years old. She had been there for him when he had been homesick for all his friends. She had been there for him when no one else in Texas was. She had been his only friend, and it was only natural when they had became more than friends, like the process was a long time in coming. And he knew he was in love with her. He just couldn't imagine life without her. Life with the twins not being able to have her with them.

After the funeral he was going to go back to his house. The house he lived in with his parents. He was going back to the memories. Back to his twins. His twins had given him the gift of life that he had needed so bad after having to face the sadness of Lane's death. They were the only true shining lights in his life. His one connection to his girlfriend. His twins. His twins that he had named after childhood friends he had been forced to leave behind, Ashley Lane Detweiler (named after his best friend and grade school crush Spinelli and, of course, named after his deceased love, Lane), and Vince Michael Detweiler (named after two more of his childhood friends, including his other best friend, Vince LaSalle).

As he thought of his kids, his mind drifted back to when he had been a child. Going to Third Street school had been one of the best times of his childhood. Maybe he could, somehow, find a way to get back to his hometown. Back to his childhood friends. So his children could have the same great childhood at Third Street as he had had. Besides, he was sure by now ole Ms. Finster and Principal Prickley had retired. They had to retire sometime, right?

And for the first time since his girlfriend's death. Since the loss of the one he loved more than anything, TJ Detweiler let a smile cross his face.


	2. The Three Musketeers

_A/N: This takes place a year and a half later from the prologue._

Chapter One

The Three Musketeers

"Spin!" she heard somebody yell behind her. She turned around and threw a smile at Mikey and Gus as they caught up with her. She was glad that they had joined her. She didn't really want to handle this pep assembly on her own.

With the Ashley's leading the spirit squad, and Vince leading the basketball team, it was just short of making her want to barf. She really missed TJ. Without TJ there, the group of the Third Street School had begun to unravel. The first to go had been Vince. Not surprisingly, however, considering that he had been best friends with TJ. And without much of a fight, the group had let him go join the jocks.

Gretchen had left around the beginning of ninth grade. Her and Spinelli were just too different to even be friends anymore. Spin was always in the office, always suspended, while Gretchen was the top of every class, even being able to move up if she had chosen to. Gretchen had decided that she didn't want to be associated with the kind of person Spinelli was while starting her high school career.

That had just left Gus, Mikey, and herself. They had become the "three musketeers". Spinelli was the tough one. She was the protector. Able to help any of them with problems by merely beating them away.

Mikey was the sensitive one. He would cry for any member of the trio when needed. He would listen, he would offer advice, he would just love you. He was also the artist. He could paint, he could draw, he could act, he could sing. And he loved every minute of it.

"Let's just skip the pep assembly," Gus tried feebly. They all knew that the stupid assemblies were mandatory.

Gus had, amazingly, become the planner. The group had played many tricks on the 'popular' kids throughout the last three years of high school. And it looked like there senior year was going to be no different. Gus loved playing pranks. He also loved getting in trouble for playing pranks.

The strong suspicion from the other two was that Gus felt if he pulled enough pranks and got in enough trouble for them, he wouldn't have to follow in his dad's footsteps and join the army. This had never been confirmed, however. Because Gus did not in anyway want to let his father down. At least, when it came to the army.

"Let's just go," Spinelli said, annoyed, but leading the way into the gymnasium, barring herself for the unpleasant events coming up.

The group had been with each other through everything, Mikey's coming out, Spinelli's brother going to jail again, Gus's parents divorce, the broken hearts from various people, the broken hearts from many unrequited loves, and the silent grieving of having lost their other three members. The emptiness as if they weren't whole anymore.


	3. Guess Who's Back?

_Disclaimer: I do not own Recess or any of its characters._

_A/N: This takes place a year and a half later from the prologue._

Chapter Two

Guess Who's Back?

TJ took a deep breath as he walked through the doorway of his old house. It had taken him a year and a half to get back here. Of course, his parents had been fully supportive of him when he decided that he wanted to move back, and they had decided to move back with him.

So, it had taken them over a year to be able to find new jobs, quit their old ones, and see if they could still buy back their old house, or if they had to find a new one. Even though it had taken so long TJ was glad that his parents were going to be there to help him. In fact, his mom had taken a night job to free up her days to watch the kids while TJ went to school.

His kids. The only two things that had seemed right with his life since they had been born. Ashley was the early one, she started walking at ten months, and had started talking a little over a week ago. Vince, however, seemed to be the fighter. He was always running into things, not really caring and hardly ever feeling the pain afterwards.

He couldn't wait to see his childhood friends. He couldn't wait to see the group. He wondered if everybody was exactly like he had left them. But, TJ knew if they were anything like him than they had all changed considerably.

* * *

TJ quietly walked down the hall of the school. Trying to avoid being noticed, while also trying to spot anybody from his old group. Suddenly, he saw something that caused him to do a double-take. There was Vince at the opposite end of the hallway, his arm flung around Ashley Q. laughing and joking around with the other Ashley's and what seemed to be three members of the basketball team. In fact, none of the rest of the group seemed to be anywhere in sight.

"Okay," TJ thought to himself, "Vince as a basketball player I can see."

He shook his head and quickly walked towards the office to get his schedule and locker assignment. He approached the office window to see Menlo working with the school secretary.

"Hey Menlo," he greeted, "Um, I don't know if you remember me from grade school … TJ Detweiler … we were in class together."

"Yes, yes," Menlo said, waving his hand dismissively, "I know. The principal will speak to you in a moment. Just, have a seat over there."

TJ obediently sat down in the indicated chair, noticing three people sitting in the principal's office. He could vaguely hear the principal yelling something about pranks on the jocks and the future leaders of tomorrow, but couldn't really follow exactly what the prank was.

About five minutes later, the door opened and out trooped Spinelli, Gus, and Mikey. All looking as if they could care less that they had just gotten yelled at by the principal.

"Weird," TJ muttered under his breath. At least three of the group had stayed together. He wondered what had happened to Gretchen.

"Three weeks detention," he could hear the principal telling the secretary, shaking his head, "for throwing balloons filled with chocolate milk, pop, and kool-aid at the basketball and cheerleading teams while at practice and at the computer club while holding their meeting."

The principal then turned to TJ, "Mr. Detweiler, is it? Please follow me."

TJ quietly followed the principal into his office. The principal quietly examined TJ's files for a moment before speaking up, "Hello, my name is Principal Hammand. I see here that you are a fairly good student, basketball player, and extracurricular activities man."

"Yes sir," TJ answered politely.

"But, I also see that you are a single teenage father," the principal continued, looking at TJ with the unmistakable look of harsh judgment and instant dislike that TJ had received so much from adults after hearing about his children, "which presents us with the dilemma of you actually being able to attend this school with all the priorities and time that it takes. Especially if you will be having to ….,"

"No offense sir," TJ spoke up, interrupting Principal Hammand before he could continue to speak, "but I came back to this town hoping that I could find the friendship and support I once had here. Yes, I made a mistake early on in my high school career. I, however, do not regret having my children, and I know that I will be able to handle this school. My mom will be watching the kids while I'm at school during the day, and if I really have as much homework as you are implying I will be having, I know that my dad will be willing to help me out during the nights. See, I have the support of my family I need, now I just need you to realize that I can do this and will be able to do this without any special treatments."

"Fair enough," the principal said, after a moment of silence following TJ's speech, "I will not treat you any differently than I would other students. So, therefore, for talking to the principal in such a state, you have detention for two days right after school for thirty minutes. Here is your schedule and have a great day Mr. Detweiler."

TJ got out of his chair and left the room, a smile gracing his face. This was going to be one heck of a school to attend. He quickly walked down the hallway, trying to spot either Vince or Spinelli again. Even Gus, Gretchen, and Mikey would have been good. He didn't see any of them, so he looked down at his schedule and realized that he had no idea where the classrooms in the school were.

"Um … excuse me," he said, stopping somebody walking in the opposite direction that he had been, "do you know where Room 315 is?"

"Sure do," the girl answered cheerfully, "it's down the hall and up two flights of stairs and then … TJ Detweiler?"

The girl had stopped in mid sentence to stare at the boy. He quickly looked up, trying to see if he recognized her, "Um, yeah, do I know you?"

"Well, no," the girl admitted, "My name is Lacey. You were in fourth grade when I was in first. You were a legend at Third Street."

"Oh," he replied, not really knowing what to say.

"Yeah, anyways," Lacey continued, "I'll just show you where the classroom is because my class is like two doors down from it."

"Okay," he said readily.

They walked down the hall, up two flights of stairs, and around the corner to get TJ to Room 315. He quietly thanked the girl and looked in on the classroom before entering it. He then got his first glimpse of Gretchen since he had moved. She looked so pale. Like she hadn't seen sunlight in about a year. He just smiled at himself, also noticing everybody else in the old gang sitting around the classroom.

He quietly slipped in and took a seat in the back of the room just as the teacher was entering the front of the room.

"Hello class," the teacher greeted, "we have a new student with us today, so I would like all of you to join us in welcoming Theodore Detweiler to our school."

TJ quietly stood up and walked towards the front of the room. The teacher held out her hand and whispered, "My name is Ms. Greene."

"Um, I prefer TJ," he informed Ms. Greene as he looked back at the rest of the class. They were all staring at him in shock, he didn't really know what else to say, so he continued with, "Guess who's back?"


	4. Conversations with the Gang: Vince

_Disclaimer: I do not own Recess or any of its characters._

Chapter Three

Conversations with the Gang: Vince

TJ sat at the back of the classroom, barely hearing the teacher as thoughts flooded his mind. He had spent so much time worried about finding the old gang, that he hadn't even thought about how they would react to his news about his kids. Sure, they might pretend to be understanding, but they would probably talk about him behind his back, laugh at him like all of his friends had done in Texas. Who was he kidding? The way this gang treated each other, there was no way they would act civilized about it at all. He would be ridiculed. He would be unpopular. No one would want to remember him as the little boy from their days at Third Street School. Startled, he looked up when the bell rang and realized that tears had started forming in his eyes.

"TJ," Ms. Greene spoke up, "since your next class is gym, I will let Vince LaSalle show you where to go."

She gestured at the boy, who had just been making his way to TJ's desk anyways to ask him some questions. TJ threw a half-hearted smile at Vince. How much had Vince changed since the last time he saw him? Heck, the last time he had talked to Vince had been about three years ago. How much had he changed since then?

Vince looked at his former best friend in awe. When did TJ decide to move back? Why hadn't he called him the minute he got back? Sure, things had changed with the old gang, but TJ was Vince's elementary best friend.

"Hey Teej," he casually greeted as he stopped at his desk, "so, you have gym next."

"I guess so," the boy shrugged.

"Come on," Vince coaxed. TJ quickly got up and followed him out the door, "were you planning on telling me you moved back?"

"You know now don't you?" TJ replied. Vince surveyed the boy. This guy wasn't the same as he had once been. Of course, neither was Vince, if he was honest with himself. But, there seemed to be something kind of well, off with TJ.

"Come on, I'll get you a gym uniform," Vince quietly said as they walked into the gymnasium, deciding to drop the subject of TJ's moving back, "Coach Martin coaches this class and the boys basketball team, so we play a lot of basketball."

"Sweet," TJ announced, smiling at the thought of this. He was actually a pretty good basketball player and loved the game.

"Hey Coach," Vince greeted as he led TJ over to the coach, "this is a new student, TJ Detweiler."

"Hey TJ," the coach said in a big booming voice, "do you like to play basketball?"

"Love it," TJ said, grinning from ear to ear, "I used to play at my old school."

"Good to hear," Coach Martin said, obvious approval in his voice, "I hate when they send me people who have never even heard of basketball."

TJ just laughed as the coach handed him a uniform and pointed him in the direction of the locker room. He followed Vince down the stairs and once down there he noticed they were the only two in the room.

"It's okay," Vince laughed, noticing his unease, "most of the time everybody else is in here too, but since we had to talk to the coach and everything, they've already dressed. You have to dress fast in this class."

"Why?" TJ questioned.

"Coach demands it," he shrugged, "you also have to take really quick showers after."

"Whatever," TJ replied, quickly getting dressed, "let's go play some basketball."

The two walked out of the locker room and sat in the circle with the other boys from the class.

"Okay," the coach yelled, "LaSalle, Dogger, why don't you two be captains today?"

Vince and the other guy quickly jogged to the front of the circle. A boy in front of where TJ was sitting leaned back and whispered to him, "Vince and Dane are always captains."

"Detweiler," Vince called the first name. Everybody looked at him quizzically before turning and looking at the boy sitting in the back. Whispers followed him all the way to the front.

"You know you didn't have to do that," TJ whispered to Vince through gritted teeth, "just because I'm new and we were best friends doesn't mean you had to pick me."

"Oh please, I didn't do it for you," Vince rolled his eyes, "you said that you played basketball in high school, which is a lot better than most of these guys can do."

For the next couple of minutes Vince and Dane called the rest of the boys to come up and join them. After the teams were in order they started a quick game.

Vince and TJ seemed to be able to pick up a good combination on the court as post and point guard. Their team quickly got ahead and held the lead all game. At the end of gym, all the boys were sweating and the coach called TJ and Vince over to talk to them.

"Vince, man, I have not seen that good of team work on the court since Lawson graduated last year and the two of you could no longer hold up your 'dynamic duo'," the coach congratulated Vince, before turning to TJ, "TJ, how would you like to try for a spot on the team. One of our players just recently moved to a different school, so we have a slot available."

"Are you serious?" TJ asked the coach. He wouldn't have even thought it possible to join this school's basketball team, but what an awesome opportunity.

"Sure," the coach shrugged, "you can come to practice today after school and get the basics of the team."

"Um, sure, but I'll be about thirty minutes late," TJ hesitantly replied, "I have detention."

"On your first day?" the coach asked, surprised.

"Yeah, is that okay?" TJ countered.

"Sure, but don't make a habit of it," the coach sternly said, "I don't like trouble makers on my team."

"Well noted," TJ respectfully answered.

"You already have detention?" Vince asked TJ as they headed towards the locker rooms, "you must not have changed that much."

"But apparently all of you have," TJ coyly replied, "What happened to the gang?"

"You left," was Vince's simple answer.

"But I couldn't have been the downfall of the whole gang," TJ protested. The two boys had reached the locker room by this point in time and were starting to change their clothes.

"You weren't," Vince dryly answered, "Spinelli, Gus, and Mikey are all still together."

"So, what's the story behind your leaving the gang?" TJ questioned. Vince had been leading the way as they began to walk out of the locker room and towards the exit of the gym, but he stopped and turned to look at TJ after the question had been asked.

"I don't know," Vince said, a look of confusion crossing his face, "After you left, I didn't feel as if I fit in anymore. Gretchen and Spinelli were best friends, Gus and Mikey were best friends. I was kind of like a fifth wheel. So, in seventh grade I joined the junior high basketball team and I was good. Actually, I was great. And I knew it. Lawson and I were really good team mates. Then, all of a sudden, the gang wasn't there anymore. And I didn't care."

"So, it just sort of happened," TJ nodded, showing he understood as the two began to walk again, "how much has everyone really changed?"

"I don't know if Spinelli, Gretchen, or myself really changed that much," Vince replied thoughtfully, "it was just more like we found the differences harder to cope with."

"Interesting," TJ muttered to himself as Vince and him walked out of the double doors of the gymnasium and onto the rest of their day.


	5. Conversations with the Gang: Spinelli

Chapter Three part b

Conversations with the Gang: Spinelli

TJ absentmindedly walked down the street kicking a rock with his hands in his pockets. He had attended the last three hours without really knowing anybody or getting to see anybody else in the old gang. He had decided to leave the campus for lunch before Vince found him again. Sure, TJ and Vince would probably become good friends again, but right now, all TJ wanted to do was visit the Third Street School.

As he approached the old school building, he stood by the fence and gaped at the school.

"It's totally different, isn't it?" TJ heard a voice behind him. He turned around and saw Spinelli standing behind him. She moved up next to him. Looking closely, he could see tears forming in her eyes.

"Yeah, when did this happen?" TJ asked quietly.

"Sometime after we left Third Street," Spinelli answered, with a shrug, "after all of us were gone ... after you were gone ... nobody really cared anymore."

"But Old Rusty and the Digger's holes and King Bob's playground kingdom area," TJ protested.

"Teej, this isn't even a school anymore," Spinelli gently told him, "Teej, you have to grow up and realize life isn't as simple as it was at Third Street School."

"Do you remember the day we kissed on the playground?" TJ asked suddenly.

"Yes," Spinelli said, aggravated, "what does that have to do with anything?"

"We were trying to grow up then. We wanted to know what kissing was like. Man, if I could go back, I wouldn't lose any of the innocence of that day," TJ replied, looking in the distance as if not really seeing Spinelli or knowing he was talking to her.

"Teej, it was just a kiss," Spinelli shrugged again.

"Yeah, but anyways, what happened to Gus and Mikey, sure they would have fun with us, but they weren't rebels without a cause types," TJ abruptly changed the subject.

"You ask about those two, but what about me Teej? Do you think I was born to go nowhere. Be nobody," Spinelli snidely replied.

"Oh come on Spinelli, you know I didn't mean it that way," TJ said, groaning at the thought of how stupid he was to even bring the subject up.

"All my life people have expected me to fail," Spinelli continued, in a rant, "and all of my life I have. Do you think that has anything to do with my failing? Gus and Mikey are the only two I can really count on to love and be with me."

"Spin, you always know you can trust me," TJ protested.

"Yeah, after you left in the fifth grade, quit writing letters or calling me in sixth and when you finally do decide to show back up, you don't call anyone," Spinelli retorted.

"How do you know? I could have told Vince or Gretch, since you don't talk to them anymore," TJ said, feeling like a little kid and that he should stick his tongue out and say, "so there" at the end.

"Because you and Gretchen were never best friends, and I looked at Vince whenever the teacher called your name and he looked about as shocked as I felt," Spinelli answered, a know-it-all look on her face.

"You must have inherited that look from Gretchen recently," TJ replied, "Oh, no wait, you couldn't have because you guys aren't friends anymore."

"Don't even go there," Spinelli threatened, "There is something totally different about you TJ Detweiler and I am going to find out what it is."

"Good luck," TJ sincerely told her. He didn't know if he was ever going to tell the old gang about his kids, but he was definitely not going to tell them before the group got back together.

"You threw water balloons at the basketball team?" TJ once again changed the subject. Spinelli's face broke out in a grin.

"Yup," Spinelli answered, her voice all of a sudden sounding very cheerful, "With those two hooligans that you so kindly called rebels without causes."

"I didn't mean it that way," TJ protested, rolling his eyes because he didn't really want to be on that subject, "why did you do it?"

"Why did we use to play tricks on Ms. Finster and Principal Prickley?" Spinelli countered.

"Because we were in elementary school, were stupid, and to fight the power of authority," TJ thoughtfully said.

"Exactly, the basketball team, the cheerleading team, they are the authority of the high school. Everybody, including teachers listen to them. So, that's why we did it, to show them we didn't appreciate their control of the school," Spinelli said, sounding like a perfect protestor.

"And the computer club?" TJ asked.

"Gretchen was in there," Spinelli shrugged.

"What exactly happened between the two of you?" TJ inquired, curiosity filling his voice.

"It really wasn't much," Spinelli said, stone-faced, "She decided in the ninth grade that she didn't want to be my friend anymore because my life was a total waste of her time. My life was, in fact, according to her, a total waste of my own time."

"Did you guys have a fight or something?"

"No, one day I went over to her house to see if she wanted to go to Kelso's and get some ice cream with me, and she just told me all this stuff," Spinelli tried to explain. It wasn't simple since she had tried to understand it since the day it happened.

"I'm sorry," was TJ's simple answer, "but what about Vince?"

"What about him?" Spinelli asked, "He became a jerk."

"Did you guys even try to include him after I left?" TJ asked.

"Well ... some, but that competitive nature got in the way of everything even in grade school," Spinelli replied.

"So, it was just as much your fault as his," TJ argued, "We made allowances for everybody's worse qualities and you guys suddenly decide to drop that?"

"That's not how it went," Spinelli protested. Suddenly feeling as if she was the one with the hostility towards her that she had displayed towards TJ not even five minutes ago.

"Oh really? Because it sounds like that to me. And that's the same reason Gretch decided she couldn't be friends with you anymore," TJ snapped at her.

"Gretch decided that she couldn't be friends with me anymore because she had a smart girl rep to protect," Spinelli retorted angrily.

"So, its all about the reps with the group now?" TJ asked.

"Oh please, Teej, its always been about our reps," Spinelli snorted.

"Maybe for you Spin," TJ answered, "but for some of us, it was about having fun."

"Theodore Detweiler," Spinelli said, using a name for him that she only used when she was getting tired of him, "You are annoying me with all of this stuff. Who cares how the gang broke up, what's important is that the gang did."

"Ashley Spinelli," TJ said, also using his name for her when he was getting frustrated, "You have always pretended to be tough. But, I know that you're not. I know that you are just as sad as me that the gang broke up."

"Whatever TJ," Spinelli said, using a softer voice. TJ glanced down at his watch and noticed that they had to be back at the school in five minutes for their next class.

"Come on, we have to get back to the school," TJ urged her.

"Nah, you go ahead," Spinelli insisted, "I think I"m going to stick around here a little longer."

"Are you sure?" TJ asked.

"Yeah, I'm sure," Spinelli replied insistently.

"Okay, well I'll see you in detention later," TJ said, with a quick wave as he began his trek to the school. He could have sworn he heard a snort come from Spinelli as he walked away.

Spinelli watched TJ go. He was totally different than he had been before. It was like a totally different person coming out in TJ. He seemed less open to new things than he had as a ten year old. He seemed less happy than he did as a ten year old. Of course if she really admitted it to herself, they had all changed considerably. She, herself, had become tougher than she had been, even tougher than as a ten year old. Her brother going back to prison had really hardened her to the real world.

But, it looked like she wasn't the only one to be hardened to the real world. She knew TJ had been through something that had changed his life. And she was pretty sure that it was something big. And she was going to find out.


	6. Conversations with the Gang: Gus

Chapter Three part c

Conversations with the Gang: Gus

TJ stepped into Room 236 for his after school detention. After doing a quick survey of the place, he realized he was the only one in the room. He knew the other three had detention, and that this was the detention room, so why weren't they here? He really didn't want to spend his first detention at his new high school by himself. He was hoping to get to talk to his friends that had stuck together through thick and thin.

Suddenly, he heard somebody run in behind him. He turned around and saw a very sweaty, red in the face, Gus Griswald. Gus slid into the desk next to him and looked around the room for something. He began to look puzzled before turning to TJ.

"Um, where's the detention monitor?" Gus asked.

"I don't know," TJ shrugged, "I just got here five seconds before you did."

"Man, I ran all the way from P.E. so I wouldn't be late and now the detention monitor is late," Gus complained. They both heard the door open in front of them and saw Ms. Greene walk into the detention room. Gus's face automatically lit up.

"Gus Griswald, fancy seeing you in here," Ms. Greene said drily as she eyed the boy, "yet, I don't see your two comrades."

"They aren't here," he shrugged. Ms. Greene then turned to TJ and a look of shock registered on her face.

"TJ Detweiler? You have detention on the first day?" Ms. Greene asked, "You are already showing this school what a trouble maker you can be."

"Yes ma'am," TJ replied.

"Okay, so thirty minutes, do whatever you want, I'm going to lock both doors and be back in thirty minutes," she said, with a wave of her hand. She then walked out the door and they could hear the clicks of the locks.

"She is by far the best detention monitor," Gus explained to TJ as soon as she left, "She lets you do anything, well anything short of leaving the classroom. One time she came back in here and Spinelli was smoking a cigarette and she didn't even turn the girl in."

"Spinelli smokes?" TJ asked, stunned by the news.

"Every once in a while," Gus shrugged, using the same shrug that Spinelli had frequented in TJ and Spinelli's conversation earlier that day.

"Hmm ... anyways, where is Spinelli and Mikey?" TJ changed the subject. Something that he was mastering remarkably well today.

"Mikey changed his after school detention to work in the cafeteria during lunch, and Spinelli usually doesn't show up to detention until the principal finally decides to suspend her because she's skipped so many detentions," Gus explained.

"And you decide to come to detention by yourself?" TJ asked.

"No, Spinelli told me you were going to be here, or else I would have begged Spinelli to come," Gus replied, "I hate being in detention by myself."

"Why do you get yourself detention then?" TJ rolled out another question.

"Because I thoroughly enjoy the yelling matches with Principal Hammand, which I'm sure you would enjoy to if you got to see Spinelli and the principal yelling back and forth," Gus answered, rather drily this time.

"Man, how many times has Spinelli been suspended for being totally stupid?" TJ muttered, more to himself than to Gus, but Gus overheard him.

"Dude, she's one of my best friends. You can't insult her like that. And, in answer to your question, she's been suspended three times for skipping too much detention, four for yelling at the principal, and twice for taking the fall when I was actually the one who did it," Gus snapped at him, "And I don't see where you go off getting all high and mighty because its your first day at this school and you already have detention."

"Just for telling off the principal," TJ angrily replied. Why were all of his conversations with the gang going so badly? Well, with the exception of Vince's, "Not for throwing water balloons at the basketball and computer teams."

"Spinelli was right about you," Gus offered, "You have changed. But, unlike her, I would rather not know what it is."

"I have not changed that much," TJ protested.

"Are you sure?" Gus asked, "You've already judged Mikey and I for being 'rebels without a cause' and Spinelli for 'throwing her life away'. The old TJ would have never done that. You told Spinelli that we stopped taking the good characteristics in stride with the bad. Well, it looks like the pot was calling the kettle black."

"Gus ... something happened while I was in Texas, I came back here to find the support of my friends again, but all I found was that all my friends had broken up. Spinelli hates Gretchen, Vince doesn't like you guys anymore, you and Spin have both treated me like I'm completely ignorant as to what is going on ... if I'm that ignorant, then fill me in," TJ ranted, "because I've been there for you guys, you have been like my family. I ...,"

"Haven't written anybody in years?" Gus helpfully added, "look Teej, if you really want the comfort of your friends, what exactly happened back in Texas?"

"I ... I can't tell you," TJ dejectedly said.

"You want our help, but you can't tell us what it is?" Gus inquired.

"I want the gang's help, not just your help, not just Spinelli's, not just Vince's, or Mikey's, or Gretchen's," TJ coldly replied to him. The two lapsed into silence.

A couple of minutes later Gus broke the silence, "We really did miss you Teej."

"I know, but what was I supposed to do, refuse to move to Texas?" TJ said, half-jokingly.

"Nah, it just wasn't the same," Gus said thoughtfully, "and as far as Spinelli hating Gretchen, there is good reason behind it."

"What, for Gretchen telling Spinelli that her life was a waste of time?" TJ asked.

"No, there's more to the story, but I'm not the one to tell you," Gus said, mentally kicking himself for saying too much already.

"Okay," TJ answered. If he wasn't willing to tell his deep dark secrets, why should everybody else be?

"So, what are you doing after detention?" Gus asked him. TJ's head was beginning to spin from the abrupt changes of subject.

"Basketball practice," TJ replied.

"You're already on the basketball team?" Gus stared, "man, you and Vince are going to be all buddy buddy before we can stop you."

"Ha ha ha," TJ said, sarcastically, "look, I will probably be friends with Vince again, I mean, hello, he is my best friend from grade school, but doesn't mean I'm going to abandon you guys either."

"You have no idea about the popular kids," Gus curtly said.

"And apparently you have no idea about me," TJ said, using the exact same tone of voice.

The door suddenly opened behind them and Ms. Greene stood there, impatiently tapping her foot, "You guys can go now. Oh, and Griswald tell your friend Spinelli that I will definitely be telling the principal about her skipping of detention."

"Will do ma'am," Gus respectfully said as TJ and him walked past the detention monitor of the week.

"Bye Gus," TJ said awkwardly as soon as they were far enough away where Ms. Greene couldn't hear their conversation.

"Bye Teej, it was really great talking to you," Gus answered, "and don't be a stranger to the Three Musketeers."

TJ looked at him oddly, before starting off in a dead sprint to make basketball practice in time. Now, was it a coincidence that his conversations with the two of the three that still hung out was kind of hostile and protective? Whereas, his conversation with Vince had gone wonderful. He knew that the remaining three had been through a lot together, but how was he ever going to get them to let him back in?

He hoped it would be a lot easier to regain their friendship than he was thinking right at this moment.


	7. Conversations with the Gang: Gretchen

Chapter Three part c

Conversations with the Gang: Gretchen

Gretchen looked out her window to see a familiar face standing on her front door step. Suddenly, a flashback of the last time that face had stood at her front door step, contemplating on whether or not to ring it. It had been the time TJ had told Gretchen that he was moving. Gretchen had been the first to know because she would be the most cool, calm, and helpful one in breaking the news to the others. Seeing the look on TJ's face as he had told Vince, as he had told Spinelli also helped Gretchen realize it was because he had to tell someone, and he couldn't tell his best friends because he knew that their hearts were going to break, and that his own heart was going to break.

Gretchen made her way downstairs to answer the door before TJ had even knocked. She swung open the door and there stood TJ, fist up as if getting ready to knock.

"Hello Theodore," Gretchen said coolly to the boy standing in front of her.

"Hi Gretch," TJ replied, a loose smile completely contrasting her very formal attitude.

"Would you like to come in?" Gretchen asked, continuing the formalities as she stepped aside to let her childhood friend in.

"Why, yes I would," TJ replied, mocking her now.

"Okay TJ what do you want?" Gretchen asked coldly as soon as they had settled on the couch. All formalities aside now, she was mean.

"To talk to one of my old friends, you know, the one I first told I was moving," TJ said, smiling again, trying to ignore the mean look Gretchen was throwing his way.

"Only because you knew I would react calmly," Gretchen snapped.

"Look, Gretch, are you going to resent me because I told you first?" TJ asked, not really understanding.

"Nah, its just ... I don't know," Gretchen said, not really wanting to tell her thoughts to TJ.

"What is up with everybody and hiding things from me?" TJ asked angrily.

"Nobody is hiding anything from you that you wouldn't have known if you would have written or called or visited," Gretchen snapped back.

"Oh, like how you are angry with me about me telling you first and you won't tell me why, that was before I ever left Gretchen," TJ snidely replied, "I didn't want to fight with you Gretch."

"I know," Gretchen said, softly, "can we start this over?"

"That is a very good idea," TJ flashed her a smile. Maybe things between him and Gretchen would be all right.

"Teej," Gretchen said, in a soft voice, "The gang ... we ... I really missed you. After you left we didn't have a leader, we didn't have somebody who fought to keep the group together. And I don't think I realized it until shortly after Vince left us."

"But, you did the same thing two years later," TJ reminded her.

"I ... I know," Gretchen continued, "but I just discontinued myself from Spinelli, not really from Gus or Mikey. The first day of school, however, I knew that they were going to stick together."

"I'm sorry," TJ offered.

"I don't know why they did stick with her. Maybe it was because of the things that I had said to her, but she had said equally mean things to other people leading up that point in time, but, everybody always liked Spinelli better," Gretchen said, tears streaming down her face, "Spinelli was everybody's favorite girl. The one they all loved. The one that was your best friend."

By that point in time she was gone and crying so much. TJ knew that she must have been wanting to let that out forever. He quickly took the girl that had felt like nothing for so long into his arms and just let her cry.

TJ's mind was swirling with all this information from the gang. Something more had happened between Spinelli and Gretchen than Spinelli had told him, but obviously it had been Gretchen's doing mostly because here she was crying about it. Vince had left the group of something that had, apparently, been both the gang's and his own fault. And how did TJ fit into all of this? He didn't even know the full story.

He didn't know why Spinelli, Gus, and Mikey stuck together through the whole thing. He didn't know why Gretchen severed herself from a group that he could so obviously tell she loved, well, he knew she felt like everybody liked Spinelli more. So, was TJ supposed to be here to put his group together? Could he even put his group back together especially when his kids came into the picture? Which reminded TJ that he needed to get home soon so his dad didn't have to take care of the kids all night.

"Gretch, I always loved you," TJ informed her, "sure, you weren't my best friend, but Spinelli wasn't my best friend because I liked her more, we were just best friends. I mean, you and Vince were closer than Spinelli and Vince ever got. Gus had a huge crush on you back in the fourth grade."

"Then why did they choose Spinelli?" she sniffled at him.

"Because you rejected Spinelli as a friend, so they felt she needed them more than you did, if she would have done the same to you, they would have done the same," TJ told her.

"But, that doesn't make sense to me," Gretchen sniffed.

"I know," TJ offered, "I know."

"You've grown up a lot," Gretchen said, smiling through her tears, "You were always the most mature of all of us. Even if we didn't want to admit it."

"I was not," TJ said modestly, "if you only knew."

"We all have our secrets," Gretchen smiled at him.

"Well, it was great talking to you, really, but I have to get home," TJ said, smiling at Gretchen, "I have a couple of things to take care of."

"Okay Teej," Gretchen said, walking TJ to the door, "Keep in touch TJ."

"Oh, I will," TJ said, giving Gretchen a quick hug, "I'll be seeing ya."

TJ walked out of Gretchen's house and down to his car. He was glad he got to talk to Gretchen. Gretchen and Vince had both been great to have conversations with. Maybe he shouldn't wait to get the gang together. Apparently, the other three had built up a wall around their friendship that TJ didn't even know if he could bring down. Gretchen and Vince, he knew, would be very supportive of him, even if the others wouldn't.

Gretchen watched TJ walk towards his car. She knew TJ had a lot going on his life. But, she also knew that he wasn't the only one. Mikey struggled everyday with the unwanted attention he got with being gay, Gretchen just wished she could be there for him. Vince was battling something that Gretchen knew nothing about, but she could see it in his face. Gus ... he didn't want to be in the army like his father, but he didn't want to disappoint his father. Spinelli had so much going on in her life that nobody knew all the details. And Gretchen, well, Gretchen was just Gretchen.

She quietly walked upstairs and turned off her computer before going into her bathroom. She didn't know when she had started feeling completely and utterly alone. It might have been the day she decided that she couldn't be friends with Spinelli anymore. It might have been the first day of school when she walked up to say hi to Gus and Mikey in the hall and both turned away from her and walked onto class. No matter what it was, Gretchen knew that she was depressed.

Quietly, she took the razor from her cabinet above her sink and, without looking, sliced her arm. Afterwards, she looked up and down her arm that was covered in cuts. She had only recently started cutting, only about the last six weeks. But, nobody noticed. Because nobody cared. Maybe now that TJ was here somebody could finally care. Maybe somebody would finally save her from the isolation. Maybe somebody would try to be her friend.


	8. Conversations with the Gang: Mikey

Chapter Three part e

Conversations with the Gang: Mikey

TJ looked at the clock. He couldn't believe it had taken until nine o'clock to finally get his kids to fall asleep. Ashley, who he fondly called Al because of her first and middle initials, had taken the longest to get clothes on for bedtime. But, Vince had been a terror to actually get to fall asleep. He couldn't get the kid to fall asleep. He had tried everything, from singing, to even driving around.

TJ laid down on his couch, ready to go to bed. He was always wiped out recently. Nothing seemed to make him less tired. Of course, given his encounter with the gang throughout the day it was no wonder that he was so exhausted. TJ still had yet to talk to Mikey. Mikey who had always been the most understanding person in the group, the most compassionate person TJ had ever met.

Soon, the doorbell rang and TJ was up quickly. He wanted to swear. Any slight sound could wake his kids up. He answered the door and was faced with Mikey and most of the agitation felt to the person who had rung the doorbell disappeared.

"Mikey?" TJ asked quietly.

"TJ, dear missed TJ, I need to talk to you," Mikey said, his face full of woe.

"Okay," TJ said, a tad bit more impatient than attended, he then proceeded to call very softly, "dad?"

TJ's dad walked into the room and gave TJ a very quizzical look.

"I'm going to go out and talk to Mikey for a couple of minutes," TJ informed his dad, giving a secret look to his father. His father nodded in understanding.

Mikey and TJ walked outside and sat on TJ's porch swing outside. TJ noted the uncomfortable silence and wondered if he should speak first.

"Theodore, I feel as if I am about to burst because I have not shared my secret with you, one of my oldest and dearest friends," Mikey burst out. TJ smiled at his friend, apparently not much had changed between Mikey and TJ's friendship in the years that had passed.

"Go ahead," TJ urged him.

"I feel as if I need to tell you that I have come out of the closet in recent years," Mikey said, dramatically.

"Okay," TJ shrugged, "that's cool with me."

"Are you sure?" Mikey asked, taken aback by TJ's automatically accepting response.

"Yes, I'm sure," TJ said, "You are my friend, I'm not going to judge you for that."

"But you will judge me for turning rebel without a cause?" Mikey asked, more curiosity in his voice than resentment.

"Ididn't judge you for that," TJ protested, "I just wanted to know when you guys turned so different?"

"TJ, we always followed your plans that were slightly rebellious," Mikey answered, "We just took it to the next level."

"Exactly, you, Mr. Softhearted, were always sad when we pulled one over on people," TJ inserted.

"Things change, people change," Mikey said, philosophically, "Do you remember when we were in grade school and when one of us would drift off to be with other people and get too far carried away, we would always bring each other back?"

"Yes," TJ answered, not seeing where this conversation was going.

"I often stay awake at night wondering where that same group has gone too," Mikey sadly replied, "Gus, Spinelli, and I make up a trio that is unforgettable, any many cases unforgivable, and strangely lacking in numbers that I and they know, but will never admit it to themselves or me, should be there."

"I miss that group too," TJ said, equal sadness in his voice, "I came back to this town to find the support of a group that was no longer here. I have my secrets too, but I guess I wanted the whole gang back together."

"Gus told me," Mikey informed him, "that is actually why I came here tonight. You talked to Spinelli, you talked to Gus, but I did not find time to talk to you today and I felt as if I needed to."

"You have no idea how much that means to me Mikey," TJ truthfully told the boy, "My conversations with Spinelli and Gus did not go near this well."

"That's because the Three Musketeers stick together," Mikey said, a faint smile on his face.

"And how does that affect me?" TJ asked, thoroughly confused.

"You insulted Spinelli, you insulted us, they feel as if they need to stick up for the other," Mikey informed him.

"And you?" TJ asked.

"I long for those days at Third Street School again," Mikey shrugged, "you were our leader then, you are the only one I know that can lead us all back together."

"But," TJ protested, "I don't even know you guys anymore. Everybody has secrets from me and I have no way of helping if I don't know the secrets."

"TJ," Mikey said, looking squarely at his old friend, "you have to give them time. Not everybody remembers the days of Third Street the way we do. Some just think of it as the past, some think of it as childish, and some just don't like it at all. Besides, you can't expect everybody to share their secrets and deepest problems with you when you can't even do the same to the friends that you want to bring back together so bad."

"I ... I'll try," TJ said, "not to tell, but to bring our group back together. You realize you are the only other one I've talked to who seems to really miss the group and will admit it."

"When the group broke up, it seems like a part of me went with it," Mikey sadly admitted, "I want that part back. And I know Gus feels the same way ... he never will admit it though. And Spinelli is Spinelli."

"Mikey, it has been great talking to you," TJ told the boy, "but I have to get back inside and get some rest. Big day at school tomorrow."

Mikey quirked an eyebrow at TJ, but didn't say a word about how early it actually was, he just stood up, "It has also been a pleasure talking to you. And just remember, you can always join the Three Musketeers, in the book, there happened to be four musketeers working together."

"Thanks," TJ smiled broadly, "have a nice night."

TJ then walked into his house and slid right onto the couch, ready to finally go to sleep, until a cry rang out from upstairs. He quickly got up to go check on his children. How would his senior year end up turning out? After talking to Vince, he had been confused, after Spinelli, Gus, and Gretchen he had been disheartened about having those real friends back together again, but now, now after his conversation with Mikey he felt hope. Hope that the group could be brought together. Hope Hope that with a little shove in the right direction, everybody would see just how much this group belonged together.

He scooped up little Vince in his arms and rocked the baby back and forth, cooing and smiling down at his little son who he loved more than life itself. He also continued thinking about the situation at hand.

The only questions on TJ's mind now, however, was what exactly was the little shove that his old group of friends needed? And could he, Theodore Jarvis Detweiler, pull it off?


	9. A Secret Agreement

Chapter Four

A Secret Agreement

Spinelli made her way down the hall glaring at everybody she saw. She was really losing her mind, she decided. Ever since her conversation with TJ at lunch yesterday she couldn't stop thinking about the group falling apart. Sure, she didn't like to admit that she missed it, but Vince had always been good for a quick game of basketball, TJ had always been there for everything she needed, and Gretchen ... Gretchen was the only girl friend that Spinelli had ever had and losing that was one of the worst moments of Spinelli's life.

She was actually starting to feel remorse for the gang's splitting up. And that was something she never wanted to feel, ever. Spinelli knew TJ would probably try and get the group back together, but Spinelli thought it was impossible. The social standards placed around each person's new groups were very hard to break. And Spinelli knew it was only a matter of time before TJ had to choose a group, and it would probably be Vince's.

Speaking of Vince, he seemed to be walking towards her at this very moment. She brushed it off as just walking in the opposite direction, but then Vince suddenly grabbed her arm and yanked her into an empty classroom.

"Sorry Vince," Spinelli snidely said to him, "I am not like the Ashley's, you can't pull me into a classroom and expect a make-out session."

"Gross," was Vince's only reply to that remark, "No, I need to talk to you about TJ."

"What about TJ?" she asked, still rudely, but Vince could hear a string of curiosity in her voice.

"There is something totally changed about him," Vince started.

"How mighty observant of you," Spinelli interrupted coolly.

"Spinelli, listen to me," Vince said, trying to keep from getting angry, "whatever is different about TJ, I want to know what it is."

"Why, so he doesn't ruin your precious basketball team?" Spinelli questioned.

"No, because he's my friend and I want to help him," Vince snapped back at her.

"Did you ever think that maybe your best way of helping him is by not trying to find out?" Spinelli asked, not even bothering to mention to Vince that she herself was planning on figuring out what about TJ had changed.

"Oh please, do not feed me that bull crap," Vince answered, "You and I are a lot alike Spinelli, we are both curious people who still care for TJ Detweiler a lot."

"I do not care about TJ at all anymore," Spinelli said, through gritted teeth.

"You can't lie to me," Vince objected, "I was the one you called crying in sixth grade whenever TJ stopped writing letters to any of us."

"That was sixth grade, this is now," Spinelli answered.

"And I know you still feel the same way," Vince said, "because that's another thing about the two of us Spinelli, we're so stubborn that we won't admit how much we care about people that have let us down."

"Yet you are still friends with TJ," Spinelli protested.

"Because he was my best friend in grade school and its not easy to forget that," Vince answered, frustration covering his voice and face.

"I did," Spinelli said quietly.

"Fine," Vince huffed, "You are not friends with TJ anymore, I get that. I respect that. But will you please help me figure out what the heck has changed about him?"

"And why did you choose me?" Spinelli snapped.

"Because you were once TJ's best friend, so I assumed that it was probably going to have to be you or me that figured the whole thing out," Vince answered.

"And what do I get if I'm in?" Spinelli questioned.

"You get to know what big secret TJ Detweiler is hiding from us all," Vince said, with a grin, "And I know that's something you are dying to know."

"Not really," she said dismissive.

"You are a pain in the butt," Vince told her.

"Thank you," she said, accepting it as a compliment, "but, okay, let's say I do want to figure out what the heck is wrong with TJ, how do we go about doing it?"

"Well, I can try to bug it out of him, but he doesn't seem to be giving it up easily," Vince admitted, "but you could spy on him, follow him around."

"That's really sleazy," Spinelli inserted, admiration in her voice.

"I know," Vince admitted.

"I'm in," Spinelli also added.

"Good, now lets agree, whoever figures it out first tells the other," Vince said.

"Understood," Spinelli nodded.

"Hey Spinelli, just a question," Vince stopped her before she could leave the classroom, "what exactly are you planning on doing with the knowledge?"

"You don't need to worry your pretty little head off about that," Spinelli answered, leaving the room shaking her head. Vince waited a couple of minutes before following her, not wanting any rumors to be started about the two of them.

But, little did he know that someone, a very curious someone had been watching as soon as Spinelli exited and also saw Vince leave. Randall Weems took off in the opposite direction of the other two and excitedly ran down the hall.

The Ashley's waited for their source of ultimate gossip to bring them the latest news before they headed towards their first period class. When they saw the speed that Randall Weems was using to reach them, they knew he had something good up his sleeve.

"Hello Randall," Ashley Q. greeted coolly.

"You will never believe this," Randall said excitedly, "I saw Vince LaSalle and Ashley Spinelli leaving a classroom together."

"So?" Ashley T. asked, disgusted at the "news" that Randall felt compelled to share.

"So," Randall said, giving the girls a duh look, "it was an empty, dark classroom. And I'm sure you all know what being in an empty, dark classroom with Vince LaSalle means."

"EWWW!" all the Ashley's said together, imagining prize catch Vince LaSalle sucking face with lower than dirt scum Ashley Spinelli.

"Yup," Randall smirked, "So, I would consider that a good gossip piece, so where's my reward?"

"Fine," Ashley A. grumbled, handing Randall a twenty dollar bill, "now leave."

As soon as Randall had left the four Ashley's grouped together.

"What are we going to do with this information girls?" Ashley B. asked.

"We could totally ruin both Spinugly and Vince," Ashley T. said, an evil smile gracing her face.

"But what happens if it doesn't ruin them?" Ashley Q. spoke up.

"What do you mean?" Ashley A. questioned the girl.

"What I mean is maybe it would up Spin's social status, and Vince's also since he hooked up with one of those unattainable girls," Ashley Q. answered.

"Interesting," the other three replied.

"So, why don't we just sit on the information for a couple of days," Ashley B. finally spoke up.

"And maybe we can use it to blackmail the odd couple," Ashley T. added thoughtfully.

"SCANDALOUS!" the four Ashley's yelled together, clapping their hands like they had done so often in the fourth grade.


	10. Gus Gets Tutored

Chapter Five

Gus Gets Tutored

"TJ Detweiler," the coach called him up front at the end of gym class. He waved good-bye to Vince and trotted up to the coach.

"Yes sir?" TJ asked.

"I went to go talk to the principal yesterday about you joining the basketball team," Coach Martin said, a frown gracing his face.

"And?" TJ urged.

"He informed me of the fact that you have two kids," the coach continued, hesitantly.

"Look, Coach," TJ started in, "I made a mistake, but I can be on this basketball team ... I know I can ...,"

"TJ!" the coach stopped him, "I wasn't going to kick you off the basketball team. I was just going to tell you that if you need to leave practice early a couple days a week, that's okay. Or if you need anybody to talk to about it, I'm here."

"Thanks Coach," TJ said, excited.

"Yeah ... well, let me just tell you something TJ," the coach began, "When I was twenty years old my girlfriend got pregnant. She had her baby, I was with her the whole time, but then she died of complications during birth. I kept my little baby girl, so I kind of understand what you are going through."

"You know, you're a really nice guy," TJ informed him.

"Just don't tell the rest of the guys that," the coach said, laughing, "now, you better get going to class."

--

Vince yanked Spinelli into a classroom at lunch break. Spinelli shot him a quick smile. They had been meeting for a week trying to figure out what exactly TJ Detweiler was hiding from them

"We've got to stop meeting like this," she joked. Vince smiled. For some reason, these meetings had brought the two former friends closer together. Not that either of them would admit it.

"TJ left early from practice again yesterday," Vince said, frustrated, "so, obviously the coach knows something because he doesn't let people leave early for random reasons."

"I can't find anything out either," Spinelli confided, "he won't even talk to me anymore."

"Why not?" Vince said sarcastically, "does it have to do with the fact that you totally ignored him every time he tried to talk to you so he just got fed up with it?"

"I know," Spinelli sighed, "Mikey and Gus are really mad at me for being rude to him."

"TJ just keeps trying to break down these social barriers, doesn't he?" Vince shook his head.

"Always," Spinelli smiled, "has he tried to get you all together yet?"

"Nah," Vince shook his head, "but I can't wait for that moment."

"Do you really dislike the old gang that much?" Spinelli asked, sitting on a desk.

"You were the ones who started leaving me out, remember?" Vince shot back at her, sitting on the desk next to her.

"Sorry about that," Spinelli muttered, not really knowing what else to say.

"It's alright," Vince shrugged, then decided to change the subject, "so, how do we find out about TJ?"

"I have no idea," Spinelli sighed, "I guess we just keep trying the way we've been trying."

"Because that gets us somewhere," Vince replied.

"It's the only thing I can think of to do," Spinelli answered.

"Unless we actually got the group back together," Vince said, thoughtfully.

"No way," Spinelli shook her head, "that would never work."

"And why not?" Vince said, huffily. He was not happy that Spinelli had turned down his idea so quickly.

"Because everybody suddenly being friends?" Spinelli asked, "Teej would never buy that."

"True," Vince muttered, "So, I guess its back to Plan A."

"Exactly," Spinelli confirmed.

--

"Gus Griswald," the teacher called him to the front of the room after class. He quickly made his way up front.

"Yes sir?" he asked respectfully. Not because he really cared about this teacher, but because this teacher was friends with his father. Mr. Leland looked at Gus and let out a sigh.

"You are flunking this class," he stated, jumping straight to the point.

"Flunking?" Gus asked, his heart beat speeding up. His dad would not be happy if he flunked class.

"Yes, and somehow I don't think your dad would be too thrilled about this news," Mr. Leland continued, speaking what was exactly on Gus's mind.

"You aren't going to tell him, are you?" Gus panicked.

"By policy, I'm supposed to," the teacher said, thoughtfully, "but, I know your father, and I know how he gets when unhappy, so if you get at least a B on the next test next Thursday you will be pulling out of flunking, but barely. If you get a tutor and actually try, I might be lenient on the rules."

"Yes sir," Gus said, excited, "who's going to tutor me?"

"Gretchen Grundler," Mr. Leland answered, "it has already been set up."

--

"You're tutoring Gus?" TJ questioned as Gretchen and him sat down to lunch.

"I know," Gretchen mumbled, "I'm not too thrilled about it."

"Why not?" TJ questioned, "You could finally win him back over to your side."

"After all that I did to Spinelli ... I think it's impossible," Gretchen muttered.

"But you did those things to Spinelli, not to Gus," TJ protested.

"He already made his decision the first time around," Gretchen corrected him.

"But that's all water under the bridge," TJ answered her, "I'm sure the two of you can become friends again. And you know Mikey wants to be your friend again."

"I know," Gretchen smiled, "he called me last night and we talked and then he came over and we watched a movie."

"See?" TJ said, "Smile. I'm back, and I'm friends with everybody ... except for Spinelli, who won't give me the light of day, and Mikey is friends with everybody, except Vince, and you are slowly gaining your friends back."

"TJ," Gretchen stated, "has anyone ever told you that you are an angel in disguise?"

"All the time," TJ replied, winking at her

--.

"Gus," TJ called as he entered the gym for basketball practice and Gus was heading out the door to go to detention.

"Shouldn't you be getting ready for basketball?" Gus questioned him.

"It doesn't take me long," TJ dismissed, "I need to talk to you."

"About?" Gus questioned.

"Gretchen tutoring you," TJ bluntly said.

"How did you already find out?" Gus asked.

"I ate with Gretchen at lunch today," he quickly answered, realizing his time was short, "I actually need you to get along with her."

"Why?" Gus asked, curiosity in his voice.

"Because she would really like to be your friend again," TJ answered.

"Okay, whatever," Gus replied, with a shrug, "I have to go to detention now."

"That went well," TJ muttered to himself as he headed down the stairs to the locker room to hurry up and change.

--

"Hey Gretch," Gus greeted as he sat down next to her the next morning before school.

"You're early, I'm impressed," Gretchen greeted him.

"Well, let's just say I'm eager to learn," Gus answered.

"Right," Gretchen replied, not believing him for an instant.

"So, TJ talked to me yesterday," Gus randomly inserted, "and he thinks that we should try and be friends again."

"Does he now?" Gretchen curtly replied.

"Yeah," Gus answered, "and I guess I'm willing to give it a try if you are."

"Cool," was Gretchen's reply and with that the two former friends seeking to rekindle their friendship began working on Gus's math class problems.


	11. Just Takes Time

Chapter Six

Just Takes Time

Spinelli walked up to Gus in the hallway and quietly tapped him on the shoulder. He spun around and grinned at his long-time friend.

"Hey Spinelli," Gus greeted.

"Don't hey Spinelli me," she growled, "I hear that you are getting tutored by Gretchen."

"Yeah, so?" Gus asked.

"And that you two are becoming friends again," Spinelli glared at him.

"And?" Gus questioned.

"I can't believe you would do that to me," Spinelli interjected.

"I didn't do anything to you," Gus objected, "What happened between you and Gretch was a long time ago."

"But it still happened," Spinelli spat back at him.

"Oh Spinelli," she heard a third voice join them, "Can't we all just get along with each other?"

"Shut up Mikey," Spinelli growled at him, "let me guess, your friends with the great Gretchen again now aren't you?"

"Why don't you just leave them alone Spinelli?" TJ added coldly, also joining in the conversation.

"Why don't you just leave me alone TJ?" Spinelli demanded of him.

"Because I'm trying to become friends with these people again," TJ answered, "and you keep trying to break them apart."

"Why are you so eager to get the group back together?" Spinelli asked him.

"We were best friends in grade school Spinelli," TJ shouted at her, "does that not mean anything to you?"

"Yes it does," Spinelli yelled back at him, "It means that you all left and I was by myself."

"By your own choice," TJ replied, "We want to be your friends again."

"Why would you want to be my friend again TJ?" Spinelli asked.

"Because ... because ...," TJ started, but didn't know what to say to Spinelli that he hadn't said before.

"Because why?" Spinelli asked, "so you can tell me that stupid secret of yours?"

"I'm not the only one keeping secrets Spinelli," TJ said frustrated, "You won't tell me the reason that you and Gretchen aren't friends anymore, you won't tell me whatever else is big in your life. I know that you feel as if we don't care, but we do. You are the one who keeps pushing everybody away."

"Whatever TJ," Spinelli yelled.

"You know what I think?" TJ started in, "I think that you are afraid that if you get close to us again you'll have to live up to your mistakes. You'll have to grow up and quit being a kid. You'll have to explore who you are."

"That's enough TJ," Gus quietly said, looking at Spinelli, who had tears streaming down her face.

"No, its not enough," TJ said, frustrated, "She's mad at you because you are being friends with Gretchen. She's being stupid."

"You're being stupid TJ," Spinelli retaliated.

"No Spinelli," TJ snarled, "It's you. Nobody believes in you because you can't achieve anything and you don't try to achieve anything. You just try to hurt those around you and you do a pretty good job of it."

"TJ, that's enough," Gus stepped between the two ex-friends.

"No, she has to hear this," TJ rejected him.

"No TJ, you have to hear this," Gus snapped back, "I know that you are upset because Spinelli doesn't want to be your friend anymore. But you have no right to talk to her like that. No right. She is worth something. And she's grown up a lot more than you think."

"Whatever Gus," TJ retorted, "This is between Spinelli and I."

"It was before you started getting too personal," Gus answered.

"Leave us alone," TJ snapped.

"No, you leave her alone," Gus countered.

"Shut up Gus!" TJ shouted, "She's being an idiot!"

Before anymore words could be spoken Gus hit TJ in the face.

"Mr. Detweiler, Mr. Griswald, and Ms. Spinelli I would like to see you guys in my office right now," the principal spoke up before TJ could react.

They followed him into his office, TJ leading the way and Spinelli bringing up the rear. As they were seated, the principal looked at each one of them separately.

"TJ Detweiler," the principal started, "we had a conversation when you first came to this school and you told me you could handle this all. But, I do not think that getting in fights is handling it at all. So I think that we need to seriously reevaluate ...,"

"Principal sir," Gus interrupted him, "It was my fault. TJ didn't do anything. I'm the one who hit him in the face."

"And you're sure about this?" the principal asked him, studying Gus.

"Yes sir," Gus answered, "He was just making me really upset about some things dealing with Spinelli."

"Fine, fine," the principal dismissed, "Gus, I am hereby giving you four days of suspension. Now, Ms. Spinelli I see that you have been skipping your detention sessions."

"Every once in a while," Spinelli shrugged, nonchalantly.

"Do you know what these means?" the principal continued.

"I have two days of suspension?" Spinelli guessed.

"Yes, and another suspension on your part will very likely lead to expulsion from our school," the principal countered her non caring attitude with, "and how do you think your parents would feel about that?"

"My parents wouldn't care one bit," Spinelli honestly answered before picking up her bag that she had dropped by her chair and storming out of the office. The principal rubbed his temples as TJ watched her go. He couldn't believe that Spinelli's parents wouldn't care. They had always been a little odd, but very much loved their daughter.

"Okay, TJ, go back to class, Gus, go home," the principal dismissed them out of his office.

The two walked out of the office and Gus turned to TJ.

"I'm sorry for hitting you in the face," he apologized, "but, dude, you have to realize that Spinelli has been through a lot. And hearing from another one of her old friends that she's worthless pretty much broke her heart."

"I know," TJ sighed, "I guess I let my anger get away with me. Man, I used to never have a big anger problem."

"That was always Spin's and Vince's area," Gus agreed.

"Do you think she hates me now?" TJ asked.

"It's very well possible," Gus admitted, "It's also very possible that she may withdraw from Mikey and I as well."

"Dude ... I really messed up," TJ said, hitting his hand against the nearest locker.

"She made some mistakes too," Gus shrugged, "we'll all move on with our lives."

"I guess," TJ answered, "I just ... I just want Spinelli to know that I really care about her. But every time I try to tell her it always comes out wrong. Or she really makes me mad."

"I know," Gus consoled him, "with Spinelli, things just take time. They just take time."


	12. Spinelli Knows the Secret

Chapter Seven

Spinelli Knows the Secret

Spinelli walked down the street towards TJ's house. She couldn't believe she was going over there. Actually, she hadn't quite figured out why she was heading over there. Maybe it was because she really wanted to know TJ's secret. But, Spinelli couldn't even convince herself that that was what it was. She knew it was partly because she missed TJ more than she would ever admit to anybody and today both of them had a crossed a line that neither had meant to cross.

Another thing was Gus had called her and pretty much griped her out. She was grateful for Gus sticking up for her, especially with all those people around. And she felt as if she owed this to Gus. Gus who had she been rude to before even arguing with TJ. Plus, she had said that everybody had abandoned her, and that was far from true. Mikey and Gus had been there for her through everything.

So, Spinelli knew why she was doing it, she just didn't like to admit why she was doing it. Even if her and TJ became friends again, Spinelli knew that the possibility of her and Gretchen becoming friends again was very slim. Oddly enough, she felt as if her and Vince were already friends again. TJ was closer to bringing the gang back together than he even knew.

She walked up to the door and rang the doorbell with crossed fingers.

--

TJ Detweiler held Al in his arms, trying to get her to stop crying when the doorbell rang. He hurried to the door, thinking it was going to be his parents' friends who they were going out to dinner with. As soon as he opened the door he immediately did a double take.

"Teej?" Spinelli questioned, a frightened tone in her voice as she looked at the baby in TJ's arms.

"Hi Spinelli," TJ feebly replied.

"You have a kid," Spinelli stated, still staring at Al.

"Yeah," TJ said, uncomfortably.

"And that's your secret," Spinelli concluded, looking at TJ's troubled face.

"Yeah," TJ said, still uncomfortably.

"This is big," Spinelli informed him.

"Can we please move past the part of the conversation where you gawk at the fact that I have kids," TJ said impatiently.

"I'm sorry," Spinelli started, but then backtracked, "wait, did you just say kids?"

"Oh, um, I actually have a son too," TJ muttered.

"Honey, Vince is fast asleep," TJ's mom said as she came down the stairs and noticed the two teenagers standing in the door looking at each other uncomfortably. After moving to Texas, TJ and his mom had become incredibly close so she knew almost everything that was going on in her son's life. Including about his group of friends and the trouble he was having with the whole thing.

"Thanks mom," he said brightly. Spinelli gave the older woman a sheepish smile.

"Nice to see you again Ashley," Mrs. Detweiler warmly greeted. Spinelli had always been one of her favorites of TJ's friends and was glad to see the girl standing in the doorway. Especially after TJ had told her what had happened at school that day.

"Nice to see you too ma'am," Spinelli muttered. Mr. Detweiler silently joined the group, giving Spinelli a quick nod noticing the serious atmosphere.

"Um, TJ, dear, are you going to let the poor girl in?" Mrs. Detweiler interrupted the group's thoughts.

"Oh, right," TJ stuttered out, moving out of the doorway so Spinelli could walk through. Right after Spinelli came in the door, a couple stepped up to it.

"Good-bye TJ darling," his mom said as his parents walked out the door with their friends to go eat supper.

"Come on," TJ beckoned to Spinelli, "we can talk while I put Al to bed."

"How did this happen?" Spinelli asked as they walked up the stairs. TJ turned around and looked at the girl as if she was crazy, "well, I mean I know how it happened obviously, but I mean … its just I never expected you ….,"

"To be so irresponsible? To be so stupid?" TJ said bitterly, "trust me I've gotten hundreds of those."

"No, its not that," Spinelli said quickly, "it's just that I … you know what, never mind."

"Anyways," TJ told her as he sat down Al in her crib, "when I moved to Texas I quickly made friends with this girl named Lane. We became best friends, not unlike you and me, and eventually we went out. One day she told me she was pregnant. I didn't know what to do. I knew I couldn't handle being a father. But, we decided to keep the baby and eventually she went into labor. After having the twins there were some complications and …. Lane didn't make it. At her funeral, where I balled my eyes out by the way, I decided to come back and be with my old friends. In fact, my kids are named after you guys: Vincent Michael and Ashley Lane. Then, I come back and all of you guys aren't friends anymore. And its partially my fault for still thinking of you guys as the Third Street school gang that I left behind in sixth grade."

"Teej …," Spinelli started, but TJ continued.

"And I'm sorry that I couldn't tell you," TJ honestly said, "but I didn't want to be judged. I didn't want you guys to be sympathetic to my face and laugh and talk about me behind my back. So, I figured given enough time I could make everybody like me enough again not to judge me. Ironically enough, the first person to find out is the person who likes me the least."

"TJ, can I talk now?" Spinelli questioned quietly.

"Go ahead," TJ said, blushing because of his ramblings. He gently guided Spinelli out of the room and down to the living room.

"This is all cool with me," Spinelli told him. He gave her a look, "No, I'm serious. I know I haven't exactly been Ms. Friendly since you got back. But, I'm not going to judge you for this. And I'm sorry."

"You're what?" TJ asked.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I did judge you when you first came back. I'm sorry for what happened to Lane. I'm sorry that I've been such a jerk. And, actually I'm sorry that I let Gus hit you instead of doing it myself," Spinelli listed. TJ laughed at her last statement.

"Speaking of that ….," TJ brought up, "now that you know my secrets, when do I get to hear yours?"

"TJ," Spinelli warned.

"I know, I know, in your own time you'll tell me," TJ said. Just then not just one, but two cries came from upstairs. The duo jumped up and ran quickly up the stairs. TJ picked up Al and looked over at Spinelli, "do you mind holding her?"

"Sure," Spinelli said, a little nervous. TJ put the baby in her arms and then picked up Vince.

"Spinelli, I do have a favor to ask of you though," TJ said as they each sat down in a rocker to rock the babies, "please don't tell anybody else about this yet. I'm not ready for anyone else to know.

"I promise," Spinelli swore. A brief picture of Vince and her meeting came into her mind, but she quickly shook it out, "so, I guess this means we're friends again, huh?"

"Bonded by babies," he winked at his former best friend as they settled into an easy quietness of just rocking the twins.


	13. Confrontations

Chapter Eight

Confrontations

Vince knew the second that Spinelli walked up to him and TJ and said hey two days later at school that she knew the secret that he had long anticipated to know. It kind of hurt that TJ had chose to tell Spinelli first when Vince had been the first to be his friend again. Not to mention the fact that Spinelli had just three days ago gotten in a huge fight with the boy in front of most of the school.

"Hey Spinelli," both boys greeted her back.

TJ was a little taken aback by the ease in which Vince greeted Spinelli. It was like the two of them had never said the awful things TJ had heard them say about each other. TJ thought that the two didn't like each other, but here they seemed tolerant … even friendly to each other. He decided that he was being crazy because Spinelli was not much for rekindling the old friendships.

"Are you going to the game tonight?" TJ asked as the three started heading towards their first class.

"Yes TJ," Spinelli said, and TJ could feel a sarcastic comment rising up in her mouth, "I'm going to the basketball game when thus far in my high school career I have boycotted every one that there has been."

"Wait, why would you boycott basketball?" TJ asked. Spinelli didn't answer, just threw a sidelong look at Vince.

"It was probably because of those jerks on the team," Vince said coolly before walking off, "I'll see you guys first hour."

"So, you want to walk together?" TJ turned to Spinelli. She shrugged and the two made their way towards their first class.

--

Vince didn't get a chance to have time alone with Spinelli until before third period. He pulled her into a room and looked at her expectantly. When she didn't answer Vince decided to prompt her along.

"Well?" Vince prompted.

"I know the secret," Spinelli tried feebly, knowing that Vince already knew that part of it. What Vince really wanted to know was what the secret was. And Spinelli didn't know if she could tell him.

"I kind of gathered that," Vince impatiently said.

"I … I can't tell you what it is," Spinelli muttered. Vince looked at her for a few seconds before answering.

"Why not?" he asked, clearly agitated.

"Because TJ made me promise," she whispered.

"And since when did you care about TJ?" Vince angrily said, "was it when he told you the secret first. Even though the two of you weren't even friends. Was it after you two had a big yelling match in front of half the school?"

"He didn't mean to tell me the secret first," Spinelli admitted, "I just sort of found out and he made me promise. I'm sorry Vince."

"You know what Spinelli? That is just so typically you," Vince shook his head at her, "you get what you want and are still able to leave others out to dry. I'm so glad that we had this little arrangement. It helped me out so very much."  
Before Spinelli could say another word, Vince LaSalle walked out of the classroom. Spinelli laughed bitterly at herself for finding TJ as a friend, but losing Vince in the process.

--

The Ashley's silently walked up to Spinelli before lunch started. They all nodded to each other before Ashley A. cleared her throat to get Spinelli's attention. Spinelli turned around and looked at the Ashley's like they were crazy.

"May I help you?" she asked coldly. She was already not having a good day, first she couldn't tell TJ's secret to anyone, and she felt that she needed to. Heck, she wanted to so bad, but she wasn't able to. She couldn't do that to TJ, and she couldn't figure out why she missed being Vince's friend so much. She wasn't his friend for five years and she didn't miss it, but when she had been his friend for two weeks, all of a sudden she missed it.

"Well," Ashley Q. smirked at the girl, "what if I told you that I have a particular piece of juicy gossip concerning two people in our school?"

"I would say get lost and never talk to me again," Spinelli said, a look of confusion on her face.

"What if one of those two people happened to be you?" Ashley T. inserted.

"In that case," Spinelli said, a look of mock horror coming over her face, "I would say please don't spread it around school, I just absolutely can't take anymore rumors about me … wait … no, no I wouldn't, I would say get lost and never talk to me again."

"We saw you and Vince LaSalle going into empty classrooms several times the past couple of weeks," Ashley B. blurted out, losing her patience with the cool act. Spinelli looked at her blankly.

"And?" she asked.

"And we know what goes on with Vince LaSalle and a girl and empty rooms," Ashley A. smirked.

"Okay, first of all, I don't want to know how you guys know that, second of all, gross, like I would ever make out with a guy who has even thought about making out with the Ashley's. And third, I don't really care if you tell everybody in the school that we were making out, what's it going to do, ruin my reputation?" Spinelli responded. The Ashley's all looked at each other a little confused.

"Newsflash _Ashley_ Spinelli," Ashley Q. snapped at her, "it could totally ruin Vince's reputation that he has tried so hard to protect."

"I don't care," Spinelli said flatly before walking past the Ashley's. Before totally leaving them in the dust she turned around to make one more comment, "Newsflash Ashley's, Vince and I weren't making out or anything else like that. You might want to get your spy Randall to find out better information before he runs to you."

"So, what do we do?" Ashley T. asked, turning to the brains behind the operation, Ashley Q, who looked to be very deep in thought.

"I cannot believe that she is an Ashley," Ashley B. muttered to herself, "she so disappoints all Ashley's around the world."

"There's something going on there that she doesn't want us to know," Ashley Q. finally spoke up.

"She said she didn't care about her reputation," Ashley T. inserted. Ashley Q. looked at her for a long moment before speaking again.

"No," she said slowly, "no, I think it more has something to do with something totally different than her reputation. Maybe her friendships. Maybe her grades. Maybe her family. But, you know what Ashley's, I am determined to find out."

"And where do we start finding out?" Ashley B. eagerly asked.

"With the second victim in this, Vince LaSalle," Ashley Q. answered, a wicked grin crossing her face.


	14. What Are You Doing

Author's Note: Okay, so I know its been a while, but I've been really burdened as far as homework and college goes. Now, this is the best I got for now, but I promise the next chapter will be better. Because this one's not very good.

Chapter Nine

What Are You Doing?

Gus knocked on Gretchen's door. It had been two days of suspension, and he was grounded beyond imaginable belief. His dad had only let him out of the house because he was going to Gretchen's for tutoring. While calling his dad to tell him about his suspension, they had also informed him of his flunking grade at school. Which had gotten him grounded for about the rest of his life.

"Hey Gus," Gretchen greeted him. Gus looked at her curiously. There seemed to be something different about her. Well … excluding the fact that she was wearing a really heavy sweater in her hot house. Actually, now that he thought about it, Gretchen was always wearing long-sleeved shirts. He followed her inside and they sat at his kitchen table.

"So, let's get this party started," Gus attempted half-heartedly to laugh off the fact that he was failing. Gretchen gave him a small smile before they opened their books.

After about an hour of studying, Gretchen got up to get the two some sodas. She walked over to her refrigerator and casually grabbed one before Gus came up behind her.

"What kind you got there?" he asked.

"It's Coke. That's all we carry at my house. My mom fanatically drinks it," Gretchen confessed to him. He gave her a smile before grabbing the Coke from her while she took another one. When she turned around to look at him Gus seemed to notice for the first time how sad she looked.

"Hey Gretch, are you okay?" he asked, his voice filled with concern.

"Sure," Gretchen answered, puzzled, "why?"

"Because you look sad," he cut to the chase.

"But I'm not," she tried to assure him. Gus reached for her and drew her into his arms.

"I think you are lying to me," Gus whispered to her, "why are you wearing a sweater when its like a hundred degrees in your house?"

"Because I'm cold," Gretchen flatly stated. Gus reached for her arm after dropping the hug and pushed up the sleeve to notice cuts on Gretchen's arm.

"Gretch …," he mumbled.

"Don't even start," Gretchen warned him.

"What are you doing to yourself?" Gus asked.

"Nothing that concerns you," Gretchen snapped at him, yanking her arm away.

"Of course it concerns me," Gus stated, following her back into her living room, "I'm your friend."

"Some great friend you are," Gretchen bitterly told him, "You decide not to be my friend anymore at the beginning of ninth grade, and all of a sudden you decide you want to be my friend again and you expect it to all be fine?"

"Do you not recall the things you said to Spinelli that led to the whole, hey lets not be friends with Gretchen thing?" Gus snapped at her.

"Yeah, yeah I do," Gretchen shouted at him, turning around to face him, "that was specifically for Spinelli, not for you or Mikey."

"Regardless, that has nothing to do with the fact that you're hurting yourself," Gus changed the subject.

"That's were you're wrong," Gretchen informed him, "it has everything to do with the reason I'm 'hurting myself' as you so kindly put it."

"What?" Gus asked for lack of better words.

"Oh please, don't act like you don't understand," Gretchen snapped at him, "besides, you have your own problems that you should be worrying about."

"Self-mutilation beats any problem I have," Gus flatly said.

"How about the fact that you're still afraid of daddy so you don't want to disappoint him?" Gretchen yelled at him, "or, you don't want to disappoint him on purpose so you do stupid things with Spinelli and Mikey to get in trouble so maybe he'll lay off of you."

"That doesn't even compare to what you are putting yourself through," he argued.

"Because not being able to stand up to daddy and totally ruining your own happiness is totally normal," Gretchen retaliated.

"Whatever," Gus muttered, "but you have to get help. No matter what you think, the ultimate decision to do this to yourself was yours. Even if we did treat you like crap. You need help. You are sick."

"Get out of my house," Gretchen yelled at him, yanking open the front door, "I've had just about enough of you. Oh, and have fun telling daddy why you're not getting tutored anymore."

"Gladly," Gus shouted back at her, walking out the front door and slamming the door behind him.

As soon as the door was slammed, Gretchen sunk to the ground and buried her face into her hands. She knew Gus was going to tell TJ, and then TJ would get all worried and tell her she had to seek help. And, probably before she knew it the whole school would somehow find out about her "problem". She didn't really consider it a problem anymore. It was just part of who she was.

Gretchen slowly got up and made her way upstairs and grabbed the razor again. She quickly sliced open her arm. Thinking about all that she had screwed up in her life. Thinking about all that her friends, former and present, had helped her screw up in her life. Thinking about how much the cutting hurt, but the inner pain hurt even worse.

Gus walked down the street shaking his head. Gretchen was supposed to be the smart one. Didn't she realize what she was doing to herself? She was destroying her body and her soul. Gus knew he had to get her help. He just wasn't sure how. His automatic gut reaction was to talk to TJ. TJ had always been the one with ideas to help the others in their group.

But, he also knew that what she had said about his relationship with his own father had hit home pretty hard. He didn't want to disappoint his dad. And he knew that the others saw it too. Every time Gus would suggest playing a trick, and then they got caught, Spinelli would always try to take the downfall. She would just shrug it off as if she didn't care about food, but Spinelli was a good friend. She knew that a lot more went on in Gus and his dad's relationship than he would ever care to admit.

Apparently, however, he was going to have to admit it soon. Face his biggest fears. He drew in a deep breath and resolved himself to not even think about that until he helped resolved Gretchen's problems.


	15. A Talk With the Leader

Chapter Ten

A Talk with the Leader

Gus Griswald nervously paced in front of TJ Detweiler's house. He didn't remember being this scared to do anything. He figured it was because he had never had to do much on his own, in grade school when he got in trouble the rest of the gang was there, and in middle and high school Spinelli and Mikey had always been there for him.

Not that he thought TJ would reject him or anything. Quite the opposite. He figured TJ would listen and probably come up with a good solution to what he was now dubbing the "Gretchen/cutting project" in his mind. TJ would probably already know something was wrong with Gretchen, considering he had been her first friend back in the group. Gus quickly knocked on the door and heard TJ yell, quite hostile actually, "Who is it?"

"It's Gus," he yelled back, taken aback by the fact that TJ had simply not just answered the door and found out who it was then.

A minute later, TJ stepped out on the porch, shutting the door behind him. TJ looked at the confused expression on his friend's face. He knew it was probably odd what he had just done, but after Spinelli so carelessly finding out his secret, he didn't want to make that same mistake a second time and was much more careful about who he opened the door for.

"Sorry, my parent's went to bed really early and didn't want to disturb them," he fabricated, indicating Gus to join him on the same porch swing Mikey and him had sat on the night when the two had renewed their friendship.

"Its alright," Gus waved it off. After the initial shock of TJ's abruptness, Gus had gone back to thinking about the situation that had led to him to be standing on TJ's porch in the first place. He looked at TJ cleared his throat, and said very fast paced, "I need to talk to you."

"Well, I assumed so since you came here," TJ shot him a grin, but it quickly dissolved when he saw the look on Gus's face, "Okay, go ahead."

"I went over to Gretchen's house tonight for my tutoring and ... and TJ, I think Gretch is depressed," Gus softly told him.

"What in the world would make you say Gretchen Grundler is depressed?" TJ bewilderedly asked him.

"Because she has been cutting herself," Gus snapped at him, "I saw the cuts on her arms."

"You must have been seeing things," TJ tried to assure him, "Gretchen is too smart to do that to herself."

"Smart has nothing to do with it TJ," Gus answered, amazed at TJ's denial in the situation at hand.

"So you're saying that Gretchen is depressed and cuts herself and please explain to me how I or any of you guys happened to miss that for so long?" TJ curtly asked.

"Because we were blinded TJ," Gus said, frustrated, "We all thought Gretch was perfect and wouldn't do anything wrong. Not to mention the fact that until a few days ago I wasn't even friends with Gretchen, so how was I supposed to notice? You've only been back for a few weeks, and if its been going on for a long time, don't you think she would have gotten really well at hiding it?"

"So you're saying its all your fault?" TJ inquired.

"What?" Gus angrily replied, "Its nobody's 'fault' if somebody cuts themselves. It could happen to everybody, not just 'stupid people'. What the heck is wrong with you Teej?"

"The first two people that were my friends again were Vince and Gretchen," TJ cooly told him, "and you are telling me that one of those two people is depressed and cutting themselves. And, even though I may not know much about this group, I do recall hearing that you guys abandoned her. That could be a serious cause of depression right there."

"You know what?" Gus asked, standing up, "Forget you Teej. If you don't want to believe it, that's all up to you. But, when you wake up one morning and realize the mistake that you made this night, it will probably be too late to do anything. So, thank you and good night."

Before TJ could reply with anything else, Gus walked off the porch. TJ quietly walked into his house and found himself asking a question: how did so much drama start in this group? He and Spinelli aren't friends then they are, Gus and Gretchen aren't, then are, then aren't again. Gus and TJ's friendship seemed to be on the brink of total disaster in itself.

Also, what if Gus was right? Cutting just didn't sound like something that Gretchen would do. But, TJ had only been back in her life for a couple of weeks. No telling what kind of person she had become in the time that he had been gone. He quietly placed his head in his hands. This group had too many problems. A few tears began to fall down his face when he heard a meek voice speak up behind him.

"Teej?" his sister, Becky, spoke softly. She was here to visit for a couple of days and couldn't help but notice TJ's forlorn appearance.

"Hey Becky," he answered, trying and failing to grin at her.

"What's wrong?" she gently asked, sitting next to him.

"How did this group get so much drama?" he asked, more talking to himself than to her, "how could they have so much crap? And then I come back and they all want to unload it on me?"

"They all do?" Becky prodded.

"Well ... no," TJ admitted, "and I hate it when they don't. And that doesn't make sense because this is all overwhelming me, but I like to hear about it. I like to help people and their problems."

"And what's the matter?" she asked, a little confused.

"I don't know who to believe. I want to believe in Gretchen, but I'm sure Gus is right," TJ replied, frustrated, "and even if Gus is right, I don't know how to deal with it. Plus, Gus has his own problems, Vince and Spin each have secrets that neither are willing to share with me. It's crazy."

"And you miss the old days when all the answers were in black and white?" Becky ventured. TJ just nodded.

"For me, it's all about how much I hated growing up," TJ replied, "I've repeated myself so many times these last few weeks. And I don't know how to do anything about it to change the circumstances that I'm in."

"I know," she soothed him before standing up, "Before I go, Teej, I couldn't help but overhear some of you and Gus's conversation. And, think about this. Do your friends here think that you would be 'stupid enough' to have kids?"

She left the room and TJ buried his head in his hands again. He definitely had a lot to think about. And definitely had a lot to plan.


	16. We Like To Call It Blackmail

Chapter Eleven

We Like to Call it Blackmail

"Hello Vince LaSalle," he heard a high voice say. He turned around and gave a half hearted smile to the Ashley's.

"Hey Ashley's," he greeted. The Ashley's looked at him expectantly and he quirked an eyebrow at them, "can I help you?"

"So, we couldn't help but notice that a while back you were going into empty classrooms with Ashley Spinelli," Ashley Q. matter-of-fact like presented the situation to Vince.

"Okay," he shrugged.

"We want to know what you were doing," Ashley B. pressed him, "we know you weren't making out or anything, you're way too good for her."

"Ashley's, not to be rude, but why in the world would I tell you something that I obviously wanted to keep a secret?" Vince asked them, turning to leave, "I mean, I'm not totally stupid."

"That went well," Ashley T. muttered to herself after Vince had walked off. Just then TJ Detweiler walked towards them and stopped when he saw them.

"Hey, have you guys seen Gretchen today? I really need to talk to her," TJ asked them.

"Why would we know where Gretchen is?" Ashley A. asked, looking at TJ as if he'd grown a second head.

"Oh I don't know," TJ said, sarcasm seeping into his voice, "Maybe because you guys go to the same school as her. Maybe because you guys have at least one class with her. Maybe because for like five seconds I thought you guys might actually act like normal human beings instead of the Spawns of Satan you are."

Not giving the four girls a chance to reply TJ briskly walked off.

"You realize that is the third member of that group to walk away from us this year," Ashley T. said icily after he was out of earshot.

"Something about that boy has changed," Ashley A. mentioned as the four girls walked towards class.

Ashley Q. suddenly looked at the other three with a look of dawning coming over her face, "Ohh! You guys, a thought just occurred to me."

---

"So, you're suggesting that Spinugly and Vince were just trying to figure out what exactly was TJ's secret?" Ashley T. asked, disbelievingly.

"Think about," Ashley Q. said, impatiently, "what is the one thing that Vince and Spinelli have always had in common?"

"They were both best friends with TJ," Ashley A. excitedly said, catching on, "and it is way too much of a coincidence that they didn't start meeting until after that certain similarity came back, isn't it?"

"Right," Ashley Q. nodded at her, "Also, we all, as in, like, the entire school know something changed in TJ's life. And if TJ didn't want anyone to know ...,"

"Then Vince and Spinelli would have to try to figure it out in private because they don't want to get caught," Ashley B. joined the band wagon.

"I'm still not convinced ...," Ashley T. said, uncertainty still masking her voice.

"Okay, here's the best part, the day we approached Spinelli was also the last known day that they were in the room together. It also happens to be the same day that Spinelli and TJ became friends again. So, I think that Spinelli knows the secret, and didn't tell Vince, so they stopped meeting," Ashley Q. spoke triumphantly.

"You are a genius," Ashley T. congratulated her, now that she was convinced, "so, girls, what do we do with this knowledge?"

The four girls laughed maniacally, knowing exactly what they were going to do with that knowledge.

---

"Ashley Spinelli," a cold voice spoke up behind her. She turned around to see Ashley T. and Ashley Q. standing behind her.

"Yes?" she replied, her voice just as cold as the Ashley's.

"We know your little secret," Ashley T. triumphantly said.

"For the last time, I never made out with Vince LaSalle in the classrooms," she snapped at the pair.

"We know that," Ashley Q. dismissed the idea with a wave of her hand, "but we also know the real reason why you were in their. Secret of TJ's maybe?"

"TJ has a secret?" she asked, trying to look nonchalant, but both girls had seen the look of horror cross Spinelli's face.

"Now, while we don't have full proof of what exactly went on, I think you'll figure out that we have enough to make a certain TJ Detweiler never want to speak to his two best friends again," Ashley Q. taunted.

"You wouldn't," Spinelli spat at her.

"Oh, you know we would silly girl," Ashley T. smiled a menacing smile at the girl.

"What do you guys want?" Spinelli snapped. Even if they seemed to have control of the situation, Ashley Spinelli was not going down with a fight.

"Well, we'd like to use a little something called blackmail," Ashley A. smoothly said in response to her question as her, Ashley B. and Vince approached them.

Vince and Spinelli exchanged a look. There was no way around this. They couldn't let TJ find out about their meeting, because then he would hate them. Yet, they hated to be blackmailed by the Ashley's.

"Okay, first off Ashley Spinelli," Ashley Q. spoke up quickly, "we want you to show up tomorrow, dressed like an Ashley. Oh, and we would like you to try out for the cheerleading squad and go on about how much you love it."

"That's it?" Spinelli asked uncertainly.

"That's just the beginning," Ashley B. grinned, "remember, we have all year for this."

"Now, Vince LaSalle, you were a little harder to come up with the first major blow for, but we decided on one," Ashley T. grinned, "we want you to publically declare these losers, well, as losers."

They handed him a picture of the Three Musketeers and walked off, laughing in their Ashley laugh. Vince and Spinelli turned to each other.

"Man, this sucks," Spinelli complained, "I cannot dress like an Ashley forever. It'll totally ruin everything about my life."

"At least you don't have to publically declare your friends to be losers," Vince said miserably, but then continued, "not that you are my friend Spinelli."

"There has to be some way to get the Ashley's back," Spinelli fumed, ignoring Vince's last part of his statement, "I can't be their slave all of my senior year."

"I don't think we have a choice," Vince shrugged, helpless, "its not like we can come up with an almighty plan to bring down the Ashley's. They know our secret."

"And we don't want TJ to know," Spinelli said miserably.

"So, we're stuck," Vince concluded. The two walked away, looking as sad as they felt.


	17. Vince Saves Mikey

Chapter Twelve

Vince Saves Mikey

Mikey Blumberg walked down the hallway with a genuine smile on his face. He was having an exceptionally good day. He hadn't heard of more schemes from Spinelli or Gus to get them in trouble. As much as he loved his friends, he really appreciated days that they didn't have to get involved in taking risks to their education.

He was looking for TJ because he had seemed preoccupied all day and Mikey had not gotten a chance to ask him what was wrong. He was glad TJ was back because the group was back more together than ever. He, himself, was friends with everyone except Vince again. Before he could travel too far down that train of thought, somebody pushed him into a nearby locker.

"Hey faggot," a voice snidely greeted him. He looked up to see a few of the boys on the basketball team sneering at him.

"Hello," he replied, evenly, moving to move past the jocks.

"You better watch out," another of the boys sneered at him, "you'll get what's coming to you."

"Why do you let them talk to you like that?" Spinelli reprimanded Mikey, who had seen the whole incident after walking out of her classroom.

"Better question is, why in the world are you dressed like that?" Mikey asked, looking at Spinelli's new outfit.

"Long story," Spinelli grumbled, "I'm also trying out for cheerleading."

"I don't think I heard you quite right," Mikey said, a disbelieving tone in his voice.

"Oh, but it will be so wonderful," Spinelli said, sarcasm coming out with every word she spoke, "but, I'm serious, don't let them treat you like crap. I'll see ya later."

Mikey watched Spinelli go, shaking his head. He didn't know what had gotten into that girl today, but there was something different about her.

---

Later that night, Mikey was walking home from the ice cream parlor and heard a few voices speak up behind him, "hey faggot. Stop."

He started to pick up his pace until he heard footsteps thudding on the ground behind him, obviously running to catch up with him. He knew he couldn't outrun these guys so he turned around to face them.

"Dude, where were you going?" one of them asked, pretending to be friendly.

"Home," he politely replied. He figured the quicker he answered them, the better chance he had of getting out of there.

"Oh," one of the other boys spoke up. There was four boys in all, and Mikey recognized them as all being varsity basketball players.

"Do mommy and daddy know that their baby boy is a queer?" one of the other ones spoke up.

"Actually yes," he coldly replied, "and they are okay with it, strangely enough, they aren't homophobic."

Mikey realized his mistake the second the words were out of his mouth. The four boys circled even closer around him.

"What did you say Blumberg?" the leader of the pack, Louis Packer, sneered at him.

"Nothing," he faintly tried to save himself.

"Now boys, I do believe Blumberg was being rude to us," Packer declared. The other three boys nodded. Before he could say anything else, the three boys pounced on him.

---

Vince LaSalle was taking a walk, trying to figure out how to declare the Three Musketeers losers without making too big a deal out of it. He suddenly stopped in his tracks to see what looked like a defenseless guy getting beat up four guys surrounding him. As he edged closer, he realized, with a sinking heart, who these people were. His old friend, Mikey, and four of his teammates beating the crap out of him.

"Hey, you guys stop it," Vince commanded as he drew nearer. The four boys turned to look at him.

"What, are you gonna stop us LaSalle?" one of the boys asked, a bemused expression on his face.

"If I have to, I will," Vince snapped back, sounding more confident than he felt. I mean, it was four of them against one of him.

"Oh, I definitely think you will," Packer sneered, inching closer to Vince. Vince quickly dropped down into a fighting stance as the four surrounded him. He quickly punched Packer in the face and kneed him in the gut. As soon as Packer fell, the other three ran off, without their leader, they were no use.

Vince went and sat down beside Mikey, "Hey Mikey, Mikey, you okay?"

Mikey opened his eyes and almost screamed when he saw somebody still standing over him, but then he realized it was just Vince. He quickly tried to stand up, but lost his balance from being dizzy.

"Hey buddy, take it easy," Vince warned him, helping him to his feet. Mikey then noticed Packer lying on the ground, groaning and holding his stomach.

"What the heck happened to him?" Mikey curiously asked.

"No idea," Vince shrugged it off, helping Mikey walk, "let's get you to the emergency room Mikey. You are in pretty bad shape."

Before Vince could dial the phone number to call his mom to have her come pick them up, he heard Mikey mutter, "Thanks Vince. Thanks for saving my life."

Vince gave him a strained smile before dialing.

---

Later that night as Vince lay in bed trying to sleep all he could think about was Mikey's thanks. He didn't really deserve that thanks. If Mikey only knew what Vince had done in his past. Or, more accurately, what he hadn't done, Mikey would never want to thank him again.

Vince flipped over in his bed and looked at the alarm clock sitting on his night stand, reading 4:00 a.m. So, how was he supposed to declare the Three Musketeers losers when he had just saved Mikey's life that night? Mikey had looked at him with utter adoration at the hospital. It was like Mikey was back in fourth grade and thinking Vince was the coolest kid in school and wanting to be like him.

Not to mention the fact that pretty much everybody was going to know that he hit Packer. In fact, Packer and the others had been detained. Meaning they were probably getting kicked off the basketball team. Which, while Vince agreed with it one hundred percent, he also realized that now he had the daunting task of replacing four of their best players, three of whom were starters.

Man, how did his life get so complicated? Last year it was like, dude, I'll do whatever I want. Now, no matter what he did he was afraid of hurting somebody. Why was he so afraid of that now?

Because he had grown a conscience. Or, had gotten his back. Dang, he liked it better when he didn't have one of those. He thought about calling his best buddy, Lawson to see what he thought of the whole ordeal, but realized that emotional conversations with Lawson at four in the morning would not go well.

Or actually, they would probably never go well. Vince was screwed.


	18. Gretchen Gets Help

Chapter Thirteen

Gretchen Gets Help

"Hey guys," TJ distractedly said as they were all heading towards lunch.

"Hey Teej," Gus, Spinelli, and Mikey greeted him back. Before they could head into the cafeteria TJ turned to them.

"Can we talk real fast you guys?" he asked, his pleading voice matching his eyes. The other three exchanged glances but followed TJ away from the crowd. Before they fully reached their destination, however, they saw the Ashley's walking towards the cafeteria. They stopped and looked at Spinelli.

"Hello Ashley S.," they greeted simultaneously, "can't wait to see you at cheerleading try-outs today! You did so good yesterday!"

Gus, TJ, and Mikey all looked at Spinelli in amazement. Spinelli just gritted her teeth, and smiled at the Ashley's, "Really because I, like, had, like, the best time of my, like, life yesterday trying out for the cheerleading squad. Like, I don't know how I ever made fun of it."

"Glad you feel that way," the Ashley's smirked and walked off, leaving the three guys to turn to Spinelli.

"What the heck was that?" Mikey asked in awe. Spinelli glared at him.

"If, and I mean this, if any of you guys mention this conversation or cheerleading try-outs now or ever again the future, I will personally hang you by your toes on a ceiling fan and beat you with a baseball bat," Spinelli threatened before turning to TJ and sweetly asking, "So, what did you want to talk to us about?"

"It's about ... Gretchen," TJ reluctantly said.

"What, did you decide to do something about it?" Gus asked, surprised.

"Actually, yes," TJ admitted, "I've been thinking a lot lately. She needs help."

"Help for what Teej?" Spinelli asked, not certain what they were talking about. The look on Mikey's face told her that he knew just as much about the situation as she did.

"Gretchen is depressed," Gus filled them in, "and has been cutting herself."

The words on the tip of Spinelli's tongue were, and this is my problem, why? But, she stopped herself from saying it. This was a bigger issue than some petty grudge that she had nursed for the girl for years.

"We need to do something for her," TJ desperately declared, "but I don't know what."

"Take away her razor?" Spinelli suggested. Just then a light bulb went on in TJ's head and he turned to Spinelli.

"You could talk to her," TJ said.

"Yes, because we all know that my conversations with Gretchen go well," Spinelli sarcastically answered him, "she won't even listen to me if I tried."

"You don't know that," TJ protested.

"I cannot and will not subject myself to that," Spinelli very forcefully said.

"Come on Spinelli," TJ begged, "Gretchen could really use this."

Spinelli looked at TJ. Which, in about five seconds she realized it was a mistake. Looking into his eyes she felt compelled to do what he asked. She let out a groan and TJ looked to almost be jumping up and down with joy.

Fine, I'll do it," Spinelli grumbled, "but if she kills me, I'm coming back to haunt you TJ."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," TJ waved off. Spinelli stomped off then. After she left Gus turned to TJ.

"TJ ... I don't know if its such a good idea having Spin talk to Gretchen," Gus quietly said.

"Why not?" TJ asked.

"Gretchen seems to think its all Spinelli's fault for her depression problem," Gus answered, "and by sending Spinelli to talk to her, we're just fueling the problem."

"I have full faith in them," TJ stubbornly said, "besides, the three of us are going to go talk to the counselor right now anyways."

---

"Hey Gretchen Grundler," Spinelli cheerfully said as she sat down next to Gretchen in her next class. Gretchen looked up at her, startled.

"Can I help you?" she asked, a little coldly. Spinelli gritted her teeth.

"So, how's life going?" Spinelli offhandedly asked. Gretchen looked at her, suspicious.

"Gus told you didn't he?" Gretchen sneered.

"Told me what?" Spinelli asked innocently.

"Don't play games with me Spinelli," Gretchen snapped, "we both know I'm the smarter one of the two of us, so I know what is called an 'intervention' when I see one."

"Okay, look," Spinelli plainly said, un-phased by Gretchen, "Teej and the rest of the gang are worried about you. I know that you think that sense I'm all high and mighty and turned Mikey and Gus against you that your depression is all my fault. And I'm here to tell you that you are full of crap."

"Aren't you supposed to help depressed people?" Gretchen asked, bemused.

"I am helping you," Spinelli said matter-of-fact like, "you are one of the smartest girls in this school and I'm sorry, if you think that I had a deliberate plot to turn Mikey and Gus against you, guess what. You're wrong. I was so distraught about the whole thing with you and everything else Mikey and Gus were scared. They were afraid I was going to be the one to go off the deep end. So, don't try to tell me I don't know how you feel. Don't try to tell me that its all my fault. I've been there Gretch. It isn't fun. It isn't easy. And most importantly, you can and you will get through this because you have TJ. You have Gus. You have Mikey. And you have ... you have me."

Gretchen looked at Spinelli, fairly surprised by her little speech. Spinelli seemed sincere about this whole thing. Maybe Spinelli was right. Actually, she knew Spinelli was right. She was also fairly taken aback by Spinelli's offer of friendship when Gretchen had been the one who so adamantly broke off the friendship in the first place. And Spinelli was not a quick one to forgive.

"Maybe your right," Gretchen conceded to the girl.

"Of course I'm right," she waved off, "now, come on, let's get you to that counselor."

The two girls stood up and quickly exited the classroom, much to the surprise of the rest of the students in the classroom. They could hear the mutters follow them all the way out the door. Spinelli was amused by the fact that everybody seemed to be surprised by the Gretchen's skipping class, but Spinelli had done it so many times that the only real surprise in the situation was that she was actually doing it with her former best friend.

---

The two girls entered the counselor's office to see TJ, Mikey, and Gus already sitting in there. Gretchen did a double take at Spinelli, who seemed as surprised to see the boys as she was.

"Come on and sit down," the guidance counselor offered, pointing them to two empty seats on either side of the group of boys.

Gretchen desperately looked at Spinelli, and then surprising everybody turned to the boys, "Can I sit by Spinelli?"

The boys all wordlessly scooted down a seat, casting a look at the two girls. They seemed to still be on rocky terms, yet also seemed to be trying to heal their very wounded friendship.

"So, Gretchen, please tell me the whole story about how and when you began cutting," the guidance counselor gently told her, "if you want them to leave, I can make them leave."

Gretchen shook her head. It was better with them there. She needed them there. She was going to be brave and get through this. She was getting help. Gretchen Grundler was facing and determined to beat her depression.


	19. I Can't Believe This

Chapter Fourteen

I Can't Believe This

Vince LaSalle looked down at his hands. These last couple of days had been pretty hard on him. First, he had saved Mikey, and had been ridiculed by many at the school and on the team. They seemed to think for his part in saving Mikey he was gay himself. Which, Vince knew wasn't true, but it was still starting to take its toll on him. Second, half the team also hated him because of the players he got kicked off the team. He also didn't feel particularly bad, except that only about five of the people on the team were talking to him. Not to mention the fact that he had to find replacements for the four who got kicked off the team. Third, TJ had told him about the whole Gretchen cutting incident. Not only had he not known anything about it until it was almost over, he couldn't be much help to her because he hadn't been a good friend to her in recent years. Fourth, he couldn't exactly go around and call the "Three Musketeers" losers right after he had saved Mikey's life. I mean, how totally hypocritical would that be? Not to mention the fact that he liked being friends with Mikey, and through Mikey Gus again. Of course, Spinelli and he still weren't on very good terms. Except for the whole Ashley's blackmailing thing.

Now he had to go find the Ashley's and tell him he couldn't do it. He knew it was between losing TJ as a friend, or losing Mikey and Gus as friends. He really didn't want to pick Mikey and Gus over TJ, but he also realized he couldn't be under the Ashley's thumbs all year.

Vince turned around the corner of the school to surprisingly find the Ashley's, his old gang, and about thirty other students just standing in the middle of the locker area. One of the Ashley's seemed to spot him because they gave him a quick smirk.

"I do believe, Vince LaSalle, that you have something you want to say?" Ashley T. politely asked him.

"Not really," he muttered, avoiding everybody's glances, including Spinelli. He could just imagine the look on Spinelli's face. She was probably looking terribly angry beyond belief. With her normal scowl tightening even more on her face, and her old habit of her hands balling up into fists taking action at the exact moment he uttered the words. No, he definitely did not have to look at her to know that much.

"What?" Ashley Q. incredulously asked the boy.

"I said not really," he said, a bit stronger this time. He met the eyes of Mikey, Gus, and TJ, who all seemed to shoot him very confused looks. As if they were trying to figure out what was going on. He still avoided the stares of any of the Ashley's and Spinelli.

Spinelli just looked at Vince as he absolutely refused to denounce her and her two friends. Did he not understand the agreement? She had been going through days of torture, dressing like an Ashley, trying out for the cheerleading squad, pretending she didn't want to hit each one of them senseless. And here he was, about to throw it all away. She wanted to shout out in protest, say, do anything, but she knew that if she did it would look even more suspicious than the whole situation already did.

"Are you sure?" Ashley. A. sneered at the boy. Vince just gave a little nod. The Ashley's then turned to an unaware TJ.

"TJ, we believe that there is something you need to know," Ashley B. coolly told him. Spinelli bit her lip, trying to keep from begging, pleading with the Ashley's not to tell him, "Vince and Spinelli have been meeting in secret to find out what secret you are keeping from this school."

TJ looked at the Ashley's and immediately said, "No way."

Then he began to look at Spinelli's and Vince's faces. Neither would look him in the eye. And both had extremely guilty looks on their faces.

"You guys didn't," TJ quietly asked him. They both flinched. TJ's quiet voice meant a huge surge of anger coming on. And sure enough, shortly following this statement, in a much louder voice, "I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU GUYS!"

Without another word, TJ turned and began to storm off. Spinelli turned to her other friends, but Gus, Mikey, and Gretchen were all looking at her with looks of horror on their face. Before she could say anything the three of them took off in the direction that TJ had gone.

"So, Ashley Spinelli, will we see you at cheerleading try-outs today?" Ashley T. asked tentatively. Spinelli turned on the Ashley's and fixed them with a gaze of craze.

"This is all your fault," she shook with anger. She launched towards the Ashley, but felt somebody grab her around the middle and drag her away from them.

"Why in the world did you do that?" Spinelli spat at Vince as soon as he let her down.

"Because we have to go find TJ," Vince pointed out.

"What a lot of good that will do us," Spinelli muttered, "he hates us now. And its your fault too!"

"Yeah, because you weren't meeting with me in secret," Vince said sarcastically.

"Will you two just shut up?" Gus harshly asked as he walked down the hall, "now, here's what I'm suggesting the two of you do. Quit thinking that this whole thing is about yourselves. This is about TJ, and how bad of friends you guys were to him. So, suck it up and apologize to the boy."

"And how exactly do you propose we go around doing that?" Spinelli coldly asked.

"Oh, you know, the usual 'try and talk to him routine'," Gus said. When the two just stood there and looked at him, he snapped at them, "go now."

---

They found TJ about thirty minutes later in front of Third Street School. The quietly walked up behind him.

"TJ," Spinelli quietly made their presence known. TJ turned around and fixed them both with fierce glares.

"Can I help you?" he icily asked.

"We're sorry," Vince simply offered, "but the Ashley's weren't entirely truthful. When Spinelli figured out your secret, she called off the meetings."

"Well, I'm so proud of both of you," TJ sarcastically said.

"Teej ...," Spinelli started.

"No, you guys are not allowed to call me Teej," TJ erupted in anger, "in fact, I would prefer it if neither of you ever talked to me again. You guys were supposed to be my best friends. Best friends do not go behind backs to find out secrets."

"What else do you want from us?" Spinelli desperately asked, "we tried saying we were sorry ... we'll do anything."

"How about leaving me alone?" TJ harshly asked. He then walked away from Spinelli and Vince.

Spinelli and Vince then looked at each other. The looks on both of their faces seemed to say that neither had a solution to make TJ be their friend again.

"The worst part of this whole thing?" Spinelli muttered to Vince as the two began walking away from Third Street School.

"Yeah," Vince half-heartedly urged her to continue.

"We deserved all of that," Spinelli said miserably.


	20. Gus and His Dad

Chapter Fifteen

Gus and His Father

"TJ, you have to talk to them," Gus urged his friend. TJ was doing his, 'I don't need Vince and Spinelli because they betrayed me and I'm better than them' act. And Gus knew that's exactly what it was. It was all an act. TJ really need both Vince and Spinelli back in his life. He didn't really blame Vince or Spinelli for not trying to apologize to TJ again. They were apparently just trying to do what TJ commanded them to do. Which, if anything, had made TJ in a worse mood because apparently he really did want them to fight for his friendship.

"No I don't," TJ said stubbornly. Gus looked around and then sighed.

"TJ, you can't hold this against them forever, well ... okay you can, but your miserable and really hate doing it," Gus informed him.

"You know what Gus? When you work your problems out with your dad then you can come talk to me about mine," TJ coldly told him before walking off.

Gus stared at the spot where TJ had been standing for a few seconds before he heard someone walk up behind him.

"Are you okay?" Gretchen quietly asked.

"Why does everybody keep taking jabs at the relationship I have with my father when I'm trying to help them?" Gus asked her, a tone of hurt filling his voice.

"Because your relationship with your father is easily your biggest downfall," Gretchen calmly told him.

"And everybody else decides to market my weakness?" Gus snapped at her.

"You talk to us about ours," Gretchen pointed out.

"Not out of sheer pettiness," Gus argued, "I want to help you guys."

"Maybe TJ wanted to help you too," Gretchen brightly said. The look Gus gave her made her retract her statement, "Fine, fine, but you really should talk to your dad."

"And say what? Oh hi dad, by the way you scare the crap out of me and I don't want to be in the army," Gus sarcastically said.

"The whole you scare me part you can leave out," Gretchen smiled at him, "but seriously, we all have problems, maybe you can work yours out."

"What about the rest of the gang?" Gus asked, "they all have problems too. Go bug them."

"Well, I decided since you were the first one to try and help me with my problem, you will be the first one I help," Gretchen logically responded.

"Fine," Gus muttered, "but if I talk to my dad you have to do me one big favor."

"What's that?" Gretchen asked.

"You have to go with me," Gus plainly stated.

"I'm sure your conversation with your dad would go so much greater if you brought me along," Gretchen sarcastically said.

"No, I mean, you don't have to go into the room with me," Gus explained, "just, like, be waiting outside with your car or something. You know, so I can have a quick exit if I need it."

"Sure," Gretchen gave him a smile.

---

"Dad, I need to talk to you," Gus determinedly said as he walked into his dad's office. His dad looked up at him, a seemingly unimpressed look covering his face.

"Did you get in more trouble at school?" his dad narrowed his eyes at him, "because how many times have I told you that those no good friends you hang out with will drag you down with them every time. If you keep up this work, there is no way they will allow you in the army. I'm beginning to think that you don't even want to be in the army son."

"That's because I don't dad," Gus muttered to his father. His father looked at him, slightly taken aback, before standing up.

"What did you say?" his dad quietly and slowly asked him. Gus got an overwhelming sense of the calm before the storm.

"I don't want to join the army dad," Gus calmly told him, "that's always been your thing, not mine."

"Oh, so its my thing to protect this country, to risk life and limb, and be in the army? But, its not your 'thing'," his dad roared at him.

"That's not what I meant dad," Gus objected, "I just meant that I never wanted to be in the army. You always wanted me to be."

"Because I wanted you to be the best person you could be," his dad yelled, "and apparently you didn't know how to do that, with your running around with your friends and getting in all sorts of trouble. You are nothing but a delinquent."

"Did you ever stop to think that I might do those things to get your attention?" Gus shouted back, "I never wanted to be in the army. I thought the best way to get your attention to tell you no was by acting out, or if I did enough maybe the army wouldn't accept me. Do you think it was easy for me to come in here and tell you that I don't want to be in the army? Because, news flash father, it wasn't."

"Get out of my house," his dad thundered, "I will not tolerate a son who cannot respect me. Get out now!"

"Fine," Gus retorted, then started walking out the door, but before totally retreating, turned back around to tell his dad a couple more things, "But, let me leave you with this thought dad: is the army really worth losing your wife, and now your son over? Think about it."

He quickly exited the room and shut the door behind him. He could just make out a sound of something being thrown against a wall. Gus tried to hold back the tears as he left the hallway. He had stayed with his father after his parents divorce because he knew his father needed him. Gus's father, one of the strongest people Gus knew, had no one except his son. He had no real friends, he didn't have a wife anymore, and it looked like he had just lost his son.

---

Gus slammed the door on Gretchen's car when he climbed in. Gretchen turned to say something to him, but seemed to think better of it and turned back to the wheel, starting the car.

"I can't believe he kicked me out of the house," Gus griped to her.

"He kicked you out?" Gretchen asked, shock registering in her voice.

"Yeah," Gus said, numbly, "take me to Mikey's, I think I'm just going to ask him if I can stay there for a while."

"Do you need to talk?" Gretchen sympathetically asked him.

"No, I just need to find somewhere to stay," Gus insisted.

A few minutes later, they pulled up in front of Mikey's house. Gus ran up and knocked on his door. Mikey answered the door and looked at the boy standing by him curiously.

"Are you okay?" Mikey asked, worried.

"Can I stay with you a for a while?" Gus quietly asked, "my dad kicked me out."

And before he knew what he was doing, Gus burst out into tears. He didn't want to lose his dad. He loved him. He could feel Mikey's arms wrap around him, trying to comfort him.

"Of course you can stay with me," Mikey soothed him, "come on in."

Gus followed him and looked around what would be known as his new home.


	21. TJ, Vince, Spinelli, Friends Again?

Chapter Sixteen

TJ, Spinelli, and Vince, Friends Again?

"TJ, will you pass me the ball?" Vince asked, an annoyed tone in his voice. Not only was TJ avoiding him outside of basketball practice, but this avoidance was beginning to affect TJ's game because he didn't want to pass the ball to Vince.

"Detweiler, LaSalle, come here," the coach called them in. Vince was shooting TJ daggers while TJ seemed uninterested in whatever Vince had to say.

"Detweiler, what is wrong with you? Why won't you pass the ball to LaSalle?" the coach roared at him.

"I'm afraid he might mess up," TJ said in an airy voice.

"Oh really? Kind of like you are right now," the coach griped, "look you two, there is a scout coming tonight to see you guys play, so, if you know what's good for you, you'll work out this petty argument you are in," the coach promptly informed them, "let's hit the showers."

"If you screw up my chances with the scouts, I will hate you forever," Vince sneered at TJ, "we tried to apologize, and you said to leave you alone. We assumed that is what you wanted. Sorry that we were wrong."

"You guys were totally unwilling to fight for my friendship," TJ called after him.

"Whatever Detweiler," Vince dismissed.

---

"And then he told me that we didn't have the willingness to fight for his friendship," Vince talked to Spinelli later as they sat down at lunch, "He told us to leave him alone, and what happens when we do? He decides to hate us even more. Sometimes I just want to give that boy a good swift kick in the ...,"

"Just let it go," Spinelli interrupted him, "I mean, TJ doesn't realize that we were giving him exactly what he wanted. It's his fault and you know what? I don't even care anymore."

"How can you say you don't care?" Vince objected, "you just became best friends with him again and then a short period of time later you aren't friends with him anymore?"

"Well ... you and I have been friends off and on for a while on this," Spinelli shrugged, "I mean, there was the initial meetings, then whenever you hated me because I wouldn't tell you the secret, and now that the whole thing with TJ erupted into our faces, we're friends again. It was Teej who wanted the whole group back together. Either he's going to have to suck it up and deal with the fact that we were horrible to him and I'm not denying we weren't, but, we tried to apologize, and we tried to do exactly what he wanted to do and neither got us very far, or he's going to have to live with the fact that he's the reason that the group he wants back together so bad isn't back together."

"Quite a little speech there Spinelli," a cold voice spoke up behind them. They turned around to see TJ and Spinelli rolled her eyes, "except you forgot one thing ... what happens if you sabotaged the whole thing all along because you did not want everybody to be friends?"

"Yes TJ," Spinelli said sarcastically, standing up, "that is the whole reason that I did this. But, my little plan all went wrong when I found out your secret. And decided not to tell Vince. Which was putting the whole plan in jeopardy, because how else would you discover our secret meetings? So, I decided to bring my arch enemies, the Ashley's into it. It was my best plan. Ever. Too bad you figured out the plot."

Without another word or leaving TJ to say anything she left the lunchroom, defiance in her every step.

---

"Maybe we should lock the three of them in the gym until they become friends again," Gus suggested later. Mikey, himself, and Gretchen were gathered at Mikey's house to talk about their three amiss members.

"And go back to find one or more dead bodies?" Gretchen asked him, "I don't think so."

"We could send apology letters to all three of them saying they are from the others," Mikey threw in.

"Do you really think they'll fall for that one?" Gretchen shot down that idea too.

"Fine Gretchen, what is your idea?" Gus asked her, exasperated. She had been shooting down his and Mikey's ideas all day.

"I don't know," Gretchen said, thoughtfully, "do you think its too late for their friendship?"

---

"Theodore Detweiler!" the coach yelled, "come out of the game."

Vince glanced up at the clock. They had two minutes left and they were down by six. Not only did most of the starters and best players get kicked off the team, but now TJ was playing as bad as he possibly could, just so he didn't have to pass the ball to Vince. Vince then threw a glance to the scout up in the stands. Earlier he had actually seemed as if he had been shaking his head at the game. Vince silently cursed TJ for probably ruining his chances to ruin his basketball career.

"Time out!" the coach then yelled. The team huddled around the coach, "okay team, we're down, and we need this win. Now, Detweiler, you and Vince are the best we have, but you have to work together. I don't care what personal issues you two have, work them out. You told me you could be on this team even with the secret we discussed, so I expect you to be able to show that exact same dedication with your other secrets."

TJ looked down at the ground and looked back up at Vince. Vince did not seem too happy with him at this point in time. So, it had gone from him being incredibly angry with Vince and Spinelli and now they were extremely angry with him. Spinelli's earlier comments about if he wanted the gang back together so bad, why couldn't he forgive them flooded into his mind.

Suddenly, somebody in the crowd caught his eye. He looked up and saw Spinelli standing in the student bleachers. And he knew what he had to do.

"Alright guys, lets do this," TJ declared, putting his hand in, the others following suit.

---

After the game was over, TJ ran to catch up with Vince and Spinelli, who were walking towards their cars.

"Hey guys," TJ muttered. The two turned and looked at him.

"Hey," they both muttered back.

"Look, I know that I told you guys to stop apologizing," TJ took a deep breath, "but, I guess I still wanted you to apologize. I know that you guys realize what you did was a mistake. It did still hurt though. My best friends trying to find out my biggest secret that I didn't want known yet? But ... but I realize that we all have changed since fourth grade, even since I came back. And since I know you guys are sorry, and since I want my gang back, let's just be friends again."

"Aww, look at TJ going all soft on us," Spinelli sarcastically cooed at him, before pulling him into a hug. The two then turned to Vince.

"Dude ...," Vince started, "you almost ruined the rest of my basketball career."

"Vince," Spinelli stated, hitting him.

"Just kidding, we're cool," Vince smiled, hitting fists with TJ. The gang was officially back together.


	22. Mikey Alone With His Thoughts

Chapter Seventeen

Mikey Alone With His Thoughts

Mikey Blumberg looked around his room, lost in his thoughts. The last couple of days Gus had been staying with him, and while the boy was very welcome, Mikey was glad for some alone time. The whirlwind that had been there senior year so far seemed to be taken its toll on the boy, leaving him no time to reflect on what all had happened.

TJ's return alone had sparked the beginning of the chaos that had ensued. Now it seemed as if every member of the old group had begun to face their worst problems, conquering them with help from the others. Gretchen, first, with her cutting problems, then Gus with talking to his dad about not wanting to be in the military. Granted, Gus's problem had not been completely solved, considering the fact that he was out of a home, but he was on his way to true happiness that Mikey knew Gus hadn't experienced since his parent's divorce when he was in the ninth grade. Mikey could see Gus and Gretchen growing closer everyday and hoped that someday soon Gus would make the move to claim Gretchen's as his.

TJ ... TJ's problems still remained a mystery to the whole gang except for Spinelli. While Spinelli's problems were known to everybody, except TJ. The others could not exactly tell TJ what was going on in Spinelli's life, only Spinelli could do that, but Mikey knew, or at least he hoped, that TJ would be able to help Spinelli.

Then there was Vince. Vince who had saved Mikey's life before they had officially become friends. There was something Vince was keeping from the whole gang that Mikey could not figure out for the life of him. Vince seemed unwilling to receive the kindness that Mikey had tried to shower him with after he had saved his life. At first, Mikey had just thought it was because he was supposed to be making a fool of the "Three Musketeers" and did not want to be seen being too friendly to Mikey.

Yet, after that had all passed over, Vince still seemed distant. Mikey's best bet was that Vince was actually homophobic, even if he had saved him. Mikey hoped that this was not going to be the case, and that he and Vince could have a good friendship.

Mikey's main issue in the last couple of years was out in the open, and he felt free. His main struggle did not deal with emotions or an internal fight within himself. No, Mikey's main concern right now was people who hated him for some of his life-style decisions. Mikey always had a soft spot for being accepted and loved by everybody, and now not only did not everybody love him, a lot of people decided to go in the opposite direction and hate him.

Which, would be all fine with Mikey, because now the gang was back together, but just the fact that these people seemed out to destroy his life made him uneasy. He couldn't easily shake them like he had thought at first. His strategy had always been to ignore them and they would go away. That tactic had not exactly worked, and after Vince saving him and the boys getting kicked off the basketball team, he knew they would be back seeking revenge.

His only two friends who really seemed to get that were Vince and Spinelli. He assumed Vince got it because he had actually seen the event take place. He had seen the hatred in the eyes of the guys. Spinelli, Mikey thought, got it because she knew what it was like for someone to seek the ultimate revenge, and it had cost someone important to her their life.

Mikey looked in the mirror and thought back to a day when his biggest problem was telling his friends that he was gay.

---

"_Hey Spinelli, Gus, can I talk to you?" Mikey said nervously, towards the middle of their sophomore year. Spinelli and Gus, who had been joking around while the three sat in detention for another of their antics, looked at him._

"_Sure," Gus said easily, sitting on top of one of the desks. Spinelli was sitting in the teacher's chair, feet propped up on the desk. This was her favorite seat when the teacher decided to leave the classroom as they served their detention. Mikey was sitting in a seat, not wanting to break any more rules._

"_You guys ... I ... I think I'm gay," Mikey stuttered out._

"_Do you think or do you know?" Spinelli sharply asked him. Gus threw her a look._

"_I know," Mikey miserably said. _

"_Finally," was Spinelli's simple answer, "I didn't think you were ever going to tell us."_

"_Wait, you guys knew?" Mikey asked, with surprise._

"_Yeah," Gus shrugged, "we are your best friends after all. Did you really think we would care about something as stupid as that?"_

"_I guess I underestimated you," Mikey sheepishly said._

---

That had been the best day of his life so far. Because of the support that he had received from Spinelli and Gus, he had been able to come out to his parents within the year. Of course, with the way things were looking right now, maybe being in the closet would have been better. Then he couldn't get beat up.

Deep down, Mikey knew, however, that he would not trade it for the world. The people that really mattered to him had accepted him. Besides, the boys had court orders to stay away from him. Surely they wouldn't break those orders, right? Mikey knew he was trying to convince himself above anybody else, but it actually was a convincing argument. All the boys had been crying in the police station because they didn't want to be in jail for too long. Surely they knew that if they broke a court order, they would be right back were they started. That didn't keep them from throwing him dirty looks in the school hallways, although they hadn't said anything to him since that night.

Just then, he heard his cell phone ring. He hurried to see who it was and Gus's name flashed up on the screen. He then proceeded to flip his phone open.

"Hey Gus," Mikey greeted.

"Hey," was Gus's greeting, "so, the gang is going to get some ice cream like old times, do you want to come? I mean, I know you wanted some alone time so I totally understand if you don't want to come."

"Of course I do," Mikey laughed at how well Gus knew him, "Ice cream with the gang beats alone time anytime."

"Good to hear you say that," Gus told him, "do you want to meet outside of your house in five minutes?"

"Sure thing," Mikey said, hanging up the phone.

While Mikey was getting ready to go get some ice cream, he couldn't help but think that maybe alone time was not what he needed right now. He seemed to be more worried about the problems circulating around his and the rest of his friends lives than he had been before his alone time. This slightly saddened him, because he was planning on using the alone time for the exact opposite reason. Mikey couldn't wait until Gus arrived at his house.


	23. So, TJ Has Kids

Chapter Eighteen

So, TJ Has Kids

"TJ, the groups back together," Gus pointed out at school on Monday morning.

"Yes, yes I know that," TJ answered, a confused expression on his face, "so, why are you pointing it out to me?"

"Because you always said that you didn't want to tell your secret until the gang is back together," Gus abruptly told him.

TJ considered his words for a moment. True, he had said he didn't want the gang to know until after they were back together. And the gang was all friends again. So, did that mean he should tell them now? Somehow, though, TJ thought that this news might bring some bad feelings to the group. How would they react? Being friends with a teenage father was probably not going to pan out well. However, Spinelli had accepted better than he thought she would have. She was calm and cool, even telling him she was totally okay with it. So, if Spinelli, the one who seemed the least eager for things to change, was okay with it, could everybody else be okay with it? Plus, there was the added fact that sooner or later they were going to find out, and by telling the gang he didn't necessarily have to let the whole school know. So, it was decided, his friends were going to find out his secret. Today.

"Okay, come after school, you'll find out then," TJ resignedly said, "and tell the others."

---

"You're really going to do this?" Spinelli asked him quietly as they walked home from school together.

"Why shouldn't I?" he nervously asked back, "I mean, we're all friends again. You understood. They will too."

"I'm not saying they won't understand," Spinelli responded hastily, "I was just making sure that you were okay with it."

"I'll be okay," TJ breathed, seeming to try and convince himself more than trying to convince her.

"Good, because thye are already here," Spinelli responded, indicating the rest of the group hanging out on the porch of TJ's house, impatiently waiting.

TJ took a deep breath. It was now or never.

"Hey guys," he greeted as he and Spinelli stepped onto the porch, and then he walked into his house and shouted, "mom?"

His mom stepped out of the kitchen to say hi to his son. She then looked around at the rest of the group assembled around her son. The look that she sent her son did not go unnoticed by the rest of the group.

"It's okay," TJ waved off, "we'll be upstairs."

"Okay," his mom said, somewhat reluctantly as the group headed upstairs. TJ walked into a room at the end of the hallway, and then turned back to the rest of the group.

"Can you guys hold on for a second?" he asked. The others nodded, wordlessly. They then heard a tiny cry come from the room TJ had entered.

"Maybe TJ has a crazy wife," Gus threw the idea out there. Gretchen glared at him.

"That wasn't a woman's cry, that was the cry of a ...," Gretchen started, but stopped when TJ left the room, holding two kids, one in each arm.

"Baby?" Vince finished her sentence, sending her a grin as he moved towards the children and TJ, "can I hold one?"

"Sure," TJ smiled at him, grateful for the reaction from Vince, while the other three seemed to be just standing there, dumbfounded. TJ handed the boy over to Vince, "Vince, meet Vince Michael Detweiler."

Spinelli then stepped forward to take her namesake away from TJ, who also gratefully smiled at her, "and this is Ashley Lane. You want to hold her Gretchen?"

Gretchen wordlessly nodded and took the year and a half old baby away from Spinelli. The group could hear Vince talking to his namesake, saying something that sounded remarkably like we'll play basketball together, the right way, not the way your daddy plays it.

"Are you guys going to respond at all?" TJ asked, encouraged by Spinelli's support and Vince's positive reaction.

"How did this happen?" were the first words out of Mikey's mouth.

"Well, when one female and one male decide to ...," TJ started, but was quickly interrupted.

"No, I mean, where's the mother?" Mikey asked.

Spinelli glared at Mikey, but TJ gave her a reassuring smile, "It's okay Spinelli. I knew the question was going to come up. She ... died after giving birth."

"I'm so sorry Teej," Gus offered, coaxing Ashley to come over to him and leave Gretchen's arm.

"It was a long time ago," TJ shrugged.

"They're beautiful kids," Mikey complimented, taking Vince away from Vince. The rest of the group looked at Gretchen, who still had not had a reaction to the whole thing. When she didn't say anything, Vince decided to fill the silence.

"So, when can I teach them how to play basketball?" Vince grinned. TJ threw a relieved look at Spinelli. He had thought that everybody was going to beg him for details of how he had gotten into the position of having kids, what Lane was like, and all that stuff. Instead, they were being cool and asking him pointless questions.

"I think you need to wait a couple of years," TJ answered.

The group then spent the next several minutes around the kids, talking about how adorable they were, how great of a father TJ must be, and how cool it was that they were named after the best people ever (this was Vince's and Spinelli's comment). During the whole time, however, Gretchen had not talked. TJ had begun to get uncomfortable with looking in her direction, because she had no expression in her eyes. Fortunately, Spinelli must have noticed his uneasiness.

"You know what?" Spinelli asked, "I think its about time we leave TJ alone with his kids."

"Sounds like a good idea," Vince quickly responded, catching on to what Spinelli was trying to do.

"But I was having so much fun," Mikey protested out loud. Gus vigorously nodded his head in agreement.

"Walk," Spinelli coldly told him. She glared at him until he put down Ashley. She then turned to Gus, who just nodded. Vince then put his namesake back down on the ground (he hadn't given the baby up since he managed to get it back from Mikey earlier).

Gus and Mikey began to walk down the stairs, Vince behind them. Gretchen, still not saying anything, also walked down the stairs and out the door. While the others called good-bye before stepping out onto the front porch, Spinelli hung back.

"So, they seemed to take it fairly well," Spinelli smiled at him.

"Yeah, except for Gretchen," TJ shuddered, "she wouldn't talk. It kind of felt a little creepy."

"I'll talk to her," Spinelli assured him, "she was probably just a little freaked out."

"I hope so," TJ replied. He then leaned in and gave Spinelli a quick hug, "I'll talk to you later."

"Bye Teej," Spinelli smiled at him. She then bound downstairs and said a quick good-bye to Mrs. Detweiler and joined the others on the porch.

The others all turned and looked at Gretchen as they walked downstairs. She stared off into space for a couple of seconds, then seemed to realize that the others were looking at her.

"So, TJ has kids," she finally muttered.


	24. Gus and Gretchen Sitting in a Tree

Chapter Nineteen

Gus and Gretchen Sitting in a Tree

"I am an absolutely horrible person," Gretchen sighed as her and Gus were driving from her house to go get some food for all of them to eat at Mikey's. After the others had left TJ's, Vince and Spinelli had gone home, whereas Mikey, Gus, and Gretchen decided to hang out to watch a movie or two. While Mikey was picking out the movie, Gus and Gretchen were on the food run.

"You are not," Gus responded automatically, "pizza or Chinese?"

"I can't believe that I couldn't say anything," Gretchen groaned, "I mean, I just looked at him. And he was so uncomfortable."

"It'll be okay," Gus tried to reassure her, "now, pizza or Chinese?"

"Pizza," she begrudgingly chose, "after all he helped me through, I couldn't do anything. I couldn't tell him it was cool with me. I could barely hold one of his kids. I was so awkward in there."

"TJ doesn't hold it against you," Gus sighed, pulling into the pizza place, turning the car off, and turning to face her, "he probably knows what people's reactions to a teenage father are. Its very probable he was expecting the same reaction you had from all of us. Just tell TJ you are sorry and its okay, and it will all blow over."

"Gus, you are a great friend," Gretchen smiled at him, before getting out of the car and running into the pizza place.

"Yeah, I'm a great friend," Gus muttered to himself and then quickly joined her inside.

---

A few minutes later the two came out of the pizza parlor holding a large pepperoni pizza. Gus sat it in the back seat before turning to Gretchen.

"Gretchen, can we talk?" he quietly asked. She nodded in response and the pair sat on the hood of the car.

"So, what's the deal?" Gretchen smiled at him.

Every time Gus looked at Gretchen, his heart would skip a beat. Every time Gretchen would talk to him, smile at him, he couldn't help but smile back. Mikey and Gus had a big conversation about Gretchen and what possible relationship she could have with Gus last night. And Gus knew now the only thing to do was go for it. After all, he had been the first to help Gretchen with her cutting problem. And Gretchen had been the one to convince him to talk to his dad. Something that he never thought would have happened. He felt like he had to tell her tonight, right now.

"I really like somebody," Gus started, then paused.

Gretchen's heart dropped a little. She had been having this feelings for Gus since they had become friends again and she had thought that maybe he returned these feelings. But, he was telling her now about somebody else he liked. Was it somebody close to her? Of course, the only close girl friend she had was Spinelli. And Spinelli didn't seem to be Gus's type. Maybe he just wanted some advice on how to ask her out. Gretchen drew in a deep breath, deciding to take it like it came.

"But, I'm sure she doesn't like me back," Gus continued, "and she's gorgeous, smart, and made me do something that I needed to do, but was so afraid of actually doing. She is the most perfect girl ever."

Gretchen glanced up at him, "And who is this girl?"

"I think you already know," Gus smiled at her.

"But I'd like to hear you say it," Gretchen smiled back.

"It's you," Gus whispered, covering the distance between the two of them and kissing her. It was a short kiss and when they drew apart they smiled softly at each other, "so, do you like me too?"

Gretchen just grinned at the hopeful expression on Gus's face, "Maybe I do, maybe I don't."

When Gus's face started to fall, Gretchen decided to give him a break, "Just kidding, of course I like you. Ever since we became friends again I wanted to be with you. I just couldn't tell you. Especially after you found out about the whole cutting thing."

"I was so worried for you," Gus muttered to her, pulling her into his arms, "I was so afraid that you wouldn't listen to anybody and you wouldn't be around anymore."

"I know," Gretchen softly said, leaning into him. They just stayed that way for a couple of seconds until Gretchen looked back towards the car, "we should probably get the pizza back to Mikey's before he starts wondering where we went."

"He probably already knows," Gus grinned at her, "but let's go anyways."

The two then climbed into the car and drove back to Mikey's house.

---

Gus and Gretchen put the pizza on the table and Mikey automatically lunged for it. After a few seconds, he glanced up at Gus and Gretchen. The two had climbed onto the couch and snuggled into each other. His arm was around her, her head was resting on his shoulder and they looked pretty cozy.

"So, what is going on with you two?" Mikey slyly asked them.

"What do you mean?" Gretchen asked innocently.

"You two are trying to pull one over on me," Mikey accused them, "I know that you guys are a couple. I mean, if Gus didn't tell you soon, I was going too. He wouldn't shut up about you."

Gretchen grinned at Gus, before replying to Mikey, "How sweet is that? I didn't know he felt that strongly about me."

"Shut up Mikey," Gus snapped at him before he could talk again, and then smiled at Gretchen, "he doesn't know what he's talking about."

"So, you didn't talk about me?" Gretchen asked.

"Let's just watch the movie," Gus grumpily said, settling back down into the couch, pulling Gretchen back too, "what movie are we watching? It better not be a chick flick."

"Well ... we're watching Two Weeks Notice," Mikey answered, happily.

"I love that movie!" Gretchen excitedly said as Gus groaned, "hey, you better get used to it. I love Hugh Grant!"

---

"Hey TJ," Gretchen quietly said, approaching him the next day at school.

"Finally talking to me?" he asked, but a smile on his lips told her that he wasn't too mad at her.

"I'm sorry," Gretchen muttered, "I just didn't know what to say. I couldn't react. I don't have a problem with you having kids, I really don't. It just was a shock."

"I know," TJ assured her, "I was pretty shocked when I found out myself. Lane practically died when I didn't respond right away. And I know people are going to think I'm totally stupid if I tell them, that's why we're only keeping it in the group."

"Sounds good," Gretchen smiled at him. Just then, Gus came up to the two of them and slipped his hand in Gretchen's.

"Now, is there something here that we don't know about?" Vince asked as he, Spinelli, and Mikey also joined the group.

"Maybe," Gus mysteriously told him, giving a small laugh and walking down the hallway with Gretchen, still holding her hand. As they made their way down the hall, people kept looking at their intertwined hands and whispering to each other.

"And now the gossiping begins," Spinelli grinned at the others as they watched the scene unfold before them.


	25. Vince's Other Best Friend

Chapter Twenty

Vince's Other Best Friend

"Vince! Are you letting me win?" Spinelli demanded to know as her and Vince were playing a quick game of basketball. So far it seemed as if Spinelli was winning, but Vince did not seem to be totally into the game either.

"Huh?" Vince asked, as if coming out of a daze. Spinelli threw the ball at him.

"Okay, fine, no basketball, tell me what's up with you lately," Spinelli demanded to know, going to sit on a picnic table nearby as Vince followed her.

"What are you talking about?" he asked, a little confused.

"You are acting all anti-gay or whatever towards Mikey," Spinelli said, straight-forward.

"I am not!" Vince defended, "I am not homophobic or whatever you guys are thinking. Besides, since when do I have to tell you anything?"

Before Spinelli could say anything more, Vince got up off the table and walked away.

---

"I'm telling you, he bit my head off just for asking," Spinelli told TJ later as she talked to him on the phone, "he seemed really touchy about the subject."

"Maybe its time to bring somebody in that knows Vince better than we do," TJ grimly said.

"Who knows Vince better than we do?" Spinelli asked, a little confused, "I mean, you're his best friend."

"But I was his best friend in grade school, and some more recently," TJ reminded her, "maybe its time to bring in his other best friend."

"Lawson?" Spinelli asked, her voice filled with disgust, "that guys as much of a jerk now as he was in grade school Teej."

"But Vince doesn't think so," TJ quietly pointed out to her.

---

"LaSalle!" the coach yelled at him, "what do you think you are doing? I thought you worked all of your personal problems out?"

"Sorry sir," Vince muttered, taking a seat on the bench and burying his head in his hands, "just a little stressed sir."

"Just a little stressed?" the coach ranted, "Maybe you should be stressed out about the fact that if we don't win this game tonight then we'll never win the state championship."

Vince sighed. Of course, the whole basketball team going to the state championship rested on him. Sure, the others were good and it did take teamwork, but Vince was their star player. And he had to get his act together. He couldn't disappoint his team, the coach, and himself.

---

After the game, his team winning, Vince sat on a bench outside of the gymnasium. He was waiting for his friends and when he looked up he saw Lawson standing uncomfortably by the bench.

"Lawson?" he asked, surprised.

"So, you'll never guess who called me to say that Vince needed someone to talk to," Lawson uncomfortably said as he took a seat next to Vince.

"Teej?" Vince muttered.

"Yeah, I didn't even know the dude was back in town," Lawson grinned, "and I tried to tell him you and I have never had a serious conversation in our years of being best friends, but you have to admit, the dude is pretty persistent."

"True," Vince smiled, "so, you going to have a serious conversation with me?"

"Sure," Lawson shrugged, "you've changed a lot since last year. I mean, you used to not care about anyone but yourself."

"And you tried to not show it, but you cared about everybody," Vince rolled his eyes at his best friend, "who would have thought you would have turned out to be the nicer of the two of us?"

"Hey, I've always been nice to certain people," Lawson protested, "but, here you are trying to upstage me on the nice basketball person scale."

"I don't think that's possible," Vince seriously said, looking away, "I really don't think it was."

"Oh come on," Lawson urged him, "you are totally going soft. I mean, we used to party hardy and you hated your old friends. That was the reason I first became friends with you, you know, because you started resenting your old friends and I loved it."

"Yeah, but if you knew what a horrible person I was, then you wouldn't want to be my friend now," Vince softly told him.

"Unless you killed somebody, then I definitely want to be your friend," Lawson joked, but telling by the look on Vince's face, he seemed to have hit something of a mark, "wait, you killed somebody?"

"Not really," Vince hesitantly told him, "its just, well, you know ...,"

"No, I really don't know," Lawson said in a panicky voice, "please fill me in on what's going on here."

"Okay, look, last year I was really drunk one night and was stumbling home because someone at the party took my keys away from me, and I can't remember who it was," Vince blurted out, "and you know that kid that died from that other town here? Like, he was bashed to death or something. Well, the guys who beat up Mikey were down in the alley beating him up, because he was apparently gay too. And then when I saw them they all looked at him. I was too drunk to actually know what was going on, but I did know that it wasn't a good thing. And instead of trying to stop them, I ran all the way home. I didn't even call the cops until the next morning, and even then I couldn't turn in the guys, I just told them about the beating I saw take place. It was an anonymous tip."

"And you blame yourself for the whole thing?" Lawson tried to understand.

"How can I not?" Vince retaliated, "I was there whenever he was dying, I watched for a couple of seconds, and then I cared too much about the basketball team to turn them in."

"This is why you are avoiding Mikey, right?" Lawson asked, "Because he thinks you are absolutely amazing for saving him, but you really know you are not because you let somebody else die."

"Exactly," Vince softly said, waiting for Lawson to tell him how much he hated him.

"You have to tell Mikey," Lawson informed him.

"What?" Vince asked, surprise filling his voice.

"Look, I may not be a big fan of your old friends from Third Street," Lawson said, committing a terrible understatement, "but, you are my best friend and I've seen how much you have changed since you became friends with them again. If you ever want to stay friends with them, you have to talk to Mikey."

"And tell him what?" Vince asked bitterly, "hey, you know how I saved your life the other night, yeah, well the exact same thing happened a year ago and I didn't save that kids life. I cared too much about my basketball team and myself to get involved."

"Exactly," Lawson said, smiling at the fact that he knew that was not what Vince wanted to hear, "and tell him you've changed. I mean, he's got to realize it if he's still friends with you. Dude, I believe in you, and they believe in you."

"We sound like a bunch of girls," Vince laughed as he reflected on their conversation, "man, no wonder we didn't have serious conversation before this."

"Yeah, we're too cool for those," Lawson agreed, "so, you want to come to a college party with me tonight?"

"Oh, so I'm more important than a college party?" Vince raised an eyebrow, "I am so very touched by that Lawson."

He then laughed and started walking towards Lawson's car as Lawson followed, shouting at him that nobody was more important than a college party.


	26. The Sad Son

Chapter Twenty-One

The Sad Son

"Gus is driving me crazy with his whole moping around because his father doesn't want him in the house anymore bit," Spinelli claimed as she slammed her locker and turned to Vince and TJ, "I mean, I do feel sorry for him, but his dad does love him, and that's why his dad acted like that."

"But his dad still has to see that in order for Gus to listen to him, he's got to be an approachable human being open to new ideas," TJ pointed out as they began walking down the hallway, "you can't expect Gus to carry on and join the Army like his dad wants him too when it's clearly not what he wants."

"That's not what I meant," Spinelli protested, "I just meant that Gus's dad does love him, and he just needs a better way of expressing it. And Gus should realize that."

"Maybe we could help him express it better," TJ suggested, "We do know Gus better than anyone."

"I really don't think his dad is going to appreciate outside help from me or Mikey," Spinelli put in, "he thinks we are the reasons his son doesn't want to join the Army in the first place."

"It would still be helpful if you went," Vince said, catching onto the idea, "if we could just get him too talk to Gus it would help a lot."

"All our group does lately is talk," Spinelli complained, "I'm ready for some action. Let's do something fun. Enough talking."

TJ laughed at her, "Well, you aren't doing the actual talking, you're helping Gus out. Come on, sooner or later the talking will be done and action will be taken."

"Fine," Spinelli mumbled, "but only because its Gus."

---

Gus hit the punching bag again, and again, and again. He was pretending it was his father. His father who had never loved him the way he was. His father who had pushed him to be someone. His father who had … fed him. His father who had … kept him safe after the divorce. His father who … loved him.

"Stupid father who makes me miss him," Gus muttered to himself as he continued to hit the bag, "he probably doesn't even think about me. Let alone miss me."

"That would be where you are wrong," a voice hesitantly spoke up behind Gus. Gus turned around to see his father standing there, looking somewhat nervous.

"Dad?" Gus asked, dropping his arms to his side.

"So, I see you like boxing," his dad said, conversationally.

"You kick me out of the house and the first words you say to me are, 'so, I see you like boxing?'" Gus started to rant, but was cut off.

"Let's box," his dad offered.

"Um, okay," Gus said, startled, leading his dad over to grab a pair of boxing gloves, and then to the rink.

"Before we start," his dad sighed, "I just want you to know that I'm sorry for everything, and please, don't hold back."  
"Oh, trust me dad, I will definitely not hold back," Gus assured him, before aiming a blow at his stomach.

"Good, because I will not either," his dad smiled, as he blocked the punch and threw one of his own into Gus's stomach.

"You know dad," Gus said, gasping for breath as he nailed his dad in the stomach, "if this is just one more thing for you to prove how much better you are than me, you can tell me now."

"No son, its not," his dad tried to say, through gasps of breath as he aimed a punch at his son, "I just want to say that … I … well … I was ….."

"Oh, I get it," Gus said, giving his dad a short smile before swinging at him, "you are trying to tell me that you're sorry and apologize, but since this is something you have never done in your life before, you are kind of lost on how to do it."

"My father never apologized to me," his dad huffed.

"You hated your father!" Gus yelled, hitting his dad.

"I know, I don't want you to hate me!" his dad screamed back, retaliating the blow.

"You make it awfully difficult for me to not hate you," Gus admitted, short of breath.

"Do you think this is easy for me?" his dad softly asked, or as softly as he could considering how hard he was breathing, "I hate admitting I'm wrong. You don't have to join the military for me to love you. You can hang out with whoever you want. Your friends know you better than I do and obviously love you more than I do because they came over to try and convince me to see how wrong I was."

"That's why you're here," Gus finally understood, "You're right, my friends do know me better than you do."

Both men fell to the floor, panting heavily.

"I'd like to change that," his dad admitted, "please move back into the house. We'll give this another shot."

"It wasn't that I ever wanted to move out," Gus softly said, "its that you never wanted me there."

"I didn't know how to react when you defied me," his dad apologized, "it was the first thing I thought of. I should have realized that being kicked out of the house was the first step towards my absolute despising of my father."

"You have to learn to respect me if I'm going to move back in," Gus argued, knowing that he wanted to move back in with his dad more than anything, he just couldn't give up that easily.

"That we can do," his dad agreed, "you are a young man. You make your own decisions. However, only if these decisions keep you out of trouble. I still reserve the right to ground you if you get suspended."

"Deal," Gus grinned at his dad, getting up from the ground and offering his dad a hand, "come on, let's go get my stuff."

---

"Do you think you can handle this?" Mikey asked, smiling at his friend as his friend hurriedly packed his bags. The others were also hanging out in his room.

"Yeah, I think we can work this out," Gus grinned, a real grin for the first time in months, "for once, my father and I are being completely honest with each other."

"That's always a good start," Gretchen encouraged her boyfriend, giving him a quick kiss. She was really happy for her boyfriend.

"I know," Gus said, turning to head out the door, but then turning back, opening and shutting his mouth.

"Yes?" TJ asked, a smirk crossing his face, "something you would like to say?"

"Mikey … thanks for letting me stay here buddy," he said, giving his friend a hug, "you are definitely the best friend ever."

"Hey!" Spinelli protested, "I would have let you stay with me!"

The others all turned to look at her, even though TJ couldn't quite figure out what the looks on the others faces meant.

"Well … you know what I mean," Spinelli hesitantly backtracked, not making eye contact with anyone, especially TJ.

"You know what," Gus said, ending the awkward silence, "you guys are all great friends. Thanks for talking to my dad. I'm so naming my goldfish after all of you. I promise."

The others grinned, enveloping Gus in a big group hug, happy for his happiness.


	27. Another Talk For Vince

Author's Note: Merry Christmas!

Chapter Twenty-Two

Another Talk for Vince

"So, who came up with the bowling idea?" Spinelli grumbled as Vince made another strike, "I'm pretty sure we should have done something that could not be considered athletic at all. I hate when other people win."

"I know Spinelli," TJ laughed, putting his arm around her, "but, losing is good for you."

"Losing is not good for you," Vince said as he joined the duo, "because if you lose … well … that means you are a loser."

"I do believe that Vince just called us losers," Gus said from his spot in another chair as his girlfriend went to bowl.

"I do believe he did," Mikey said, a slight smile on his face. Vince had seemed distracted all night, and had still found time to kick their butts at bowling and look like he was having fun. Mikey seriously doubted anybody, but maybe TJ, could see that Vince wasn't all there tonight.

"Maybe you should talk to him," Spinelli whispered to Mikey as she joined him by his seat. Mikey was very surprised that she would have noticed he was distracted, "I'm pretty sure his distraction probably has something to do with his talk with Lawson, which was supposed to be about your friendship, so go talk to him."

"That is so much easier said than done," Mikey pointed out to her, "all he's done since we became 'friends' again is ignore me and avoid me."

"And that is why you are going to talk to him," Spinelli insisted before looking up, "hey Vince, come over here."

Vince obeyed, throwing TJ a look of 'what did I do now?' before walking over there, "yeah?"

"You have to talk to Mikey," Spinelli instructed, "right now. You two need to get whatever this weird factor in your friendship is out of the way so I don't have to listen to Mikey complain about it anymore."

"Yes ma'am," Vince smiled at her and beckoned Mikey to follow him outside.

"You know what?" TJ said as he sat down beside her again, "you always say that its because you are annoyed with the complaining and that's why you want everybody to be back together, but I really think somewhere in you, that Ashley Spinelli has a heart of gold."

"Maybe," Spinelli shrugged, looking at him with a smile, "maybe if you dig really deep."

---

"So, what is going on with you?" Mikey plainly asked Vince as soon as they got outside.

"Before I start, I just want you to know that everything that happened I regret and I feel really sleazy about the whole thing," Vince muttered, looking at his feet.

"I believe that things that happened in the past should be left in the past," Mikey said, firmly.

"Okay, that kid that died last year from that other school, you know who he was, right?" Vince asked, but before Mikey could answer, Vince continued, "I watched my friends beat him to death. I ran away, scared, that they would do the same to me just because I happened to witness it. I called the cops the next morning to tell them about the beatings, but I didn't give them any names of people. I was drunk, but not drunk enough to not know what was going on."

Vince looked up at Mikey as he completed his statement, who looked totally stunned.

"You mean you watched the people that you used to call friends beat up Billy?" Mikey asked in a low voice. Vince couldn't make out if there was grief or anger in his voice, maybe a mixture of both.

"I was there for only two seconds," Vince hesitantly said, "but I totally blame myself for his death."

"Well, you should," Mikey sharply said, "I can't believe you watched him die and didn't do anything about it. No wonder you couldn't face me when I thought you were a hero, because you knew you weren't. You were actually a zero. But, thanks for helping me see that now."

Without another word, Mikey walked back into the bowling alley, shaking his head.

"That went terrific," Vince sarcastically said, about to head back into the bowling alley too, but deciding against it. He would just text message TJ or Spinelli to tell them that he couldn't finish out the game.

---

"You know Vince, you can't avoid the group forever," Spinelli stated as she sat her lunch plate next to his two days later.

"What, you guys don't hate me?" Vince asked, a little surprised, "I thought Mikey would have told you all about why he hates me."

"Nope," Spinelli cheerfully stated, "that's why you are going to fill me in now."

Vince thought about it for a second, wondering if he should. He had already told more people than he was planning on by telling Mikey and Lawson, but if it was already out in the open, he might as well tell one more person, so he told Spinelli the story, who listened intently and nodded a couple of times.

"I understand now," Spinelli quietly said after he was done.

"You understand what now?" Vince asked, confused.

"That kid that died?" Spinelli said, "his name was Billy. That was Mikey's boyfriend at the time. Did you ever wonder how he ended up in this town, that's the reason why. Man, Mikey was so torn up over his death that he vowed to get revenge on whoever did that to Billy."

"So, do you blame me too?" Vince asked, not knowing how to process the information about Mikey and Billy's relationship.

"Well, you didn't beat him, and you did call it in, even if it was the next morning, so yes, you partially get blame for the whole thing," Spinelli rationalized, but seeing the look on Vince's face continued, "but, that was then and this is now. You've changed, you regret that and I'm sure you never regretted it before. So, if you don't mind I'm going to be staying your friend for awhile."

---

"You do realize that you spent a long time wondering why Vince wouldn't be your full friend again and then when he offers to actually tell you the reason, you turn your back on him," TJ quietly said as he approached Mikey, who was sitting on a park bench.

"You don't understand the circumstances Teej," Mikey abruptly told him.

"Try me," TJ urged him, "I probably understand them better than you think."

Mikey sighed and explained the whole thing about Billy, including about Billy and Mikey's relationship, and about Vince's part in his death. TJ sat there silently as he ranted on in the story before finally speaking.

"You do realize that because he told you that means that he has turned over a new leaf, right?" TJ asked, "and you are the one who told him that you think that events should be left in the past if you're sorry for them."

"But this one can't be," Mikey protested, "I almost didn't handle the whole thing."

"And you're going to get back at Vince for his part in it?" TJ asked, "Ruin a whole friendship for something Vince didn't even have to tell you, he chose to. That's really mature Mikey. I know it hurts that the whole thing happened that way, but Vince has changed, he does regret it, and I think you should forgive him, but its your choice."

---

"Vince …," Mikey started as he approached Vince at his locker the next day, but Vince interrupted.

"I'm so sorry Mikey," Vince gushed, "Spinelli explained to me about Billy and I realize why you were upset with me."

"This is going to be hard," Mikey started, "but I would like it if we could start our friendship anew. Start it with the light of this news, so I don't have to think that you are something you're not anymore. You are a good friend and turning into a good person, and that is enough for me."

"Me too," Vince smiled, "come on, let's go to class."


	28. The Return of the Ashleys

Author's Note: Sorry it has been so long since my last update, I was just home over the break and was really bored and had no motivation.

Chapter Twenty-Three

The Return of the Ashleys

"Looks like things are finally settling back into normal," TJ commented to Spinelli as they walked to lunch.

"Except, you know, not," Spinelli replied, "we may all be friends again, but we've all grown up too much for things to be the way they were when we were in grade school."

"You keep throwing out these sentences that I can't figure out if they are hints or not," TJ said, frustrated as he changed the subject, "are you ever going to tell me about your life? I mean, everybody in the entire universe knows except me."

"I wouldn't go so far as to say the universe," Spinelli smiled at him, but then turned serious, "look, TJ, this is really difficult for me to talk about. But, I promise you, when the time is right I will tell you. And you will absolutely love me for it."

With those words, Spinelli walked away to go join Gretchen and the others in the lunch line, leaving TJ shaking his head behind her.

"Somehow, I have a feeling that she's never going to tell me," TJ said, before hurrying to join the rest in line.

---

"Hello Ashley Spinelli," Spinelli could hear Ashley A.'s voice as herself and Gretchen were having a quick run to the girls room during lunch. Spinelli rolled her eyes and turned around, not surprised to find all four Ashley's standing behind them, hands on hips.

"Hi Ashley A., T., Q., and B.," Spinelli calmly said, rolling her eyes at Gretchen, who smiled.

"You look like you didn't get much sleep last night," Ashley B. commented to her, "did your mommy not give you a curfew?"

"Of course not," Ashley T. continued, "you silly girl, her mom just walks around like a zombie."

"I think she just forgot," Ashley Q. said, "she is rather a forgetful girl. But, that is rather interesting news to forget. Because, you know, when there is one bad seed in the family, they are all bad seeds."

"Ashley's, why don't you go pick on somebody with your IQ level, please?" Spinelli coldly said, while Gretchen turned a faint shade of pink in her cheeks as if she was more offended by the comments of the family than Spinelli.

"That hurts us so deep," Ashley A. sarcastically said, "I just don't understand why you force us to do these things?"

"Do what things?" Spinelli asked, "Talk to me? Because I do not recall under any circumstances asking you to talk to me. Forget forcing you to talk to me."

"Well, you just scream for a little Ashley group time," Ashley B. informed her, "I mean, with those clothes and that hair style, you definitely need us."

"She needs you like she needs an ice pick through her right eye," Gretchen said, under her breath.

"So, the faithful side kick has returned," Ashley Q. rolled her eyes, "of course, you aren't a very good sidekick."

"I don't know," Ashley T. cocked her head, "she is a good side kick, except not very faithful."

"Shut up," Spinelli said, gritting her teeth.

"Oh come on, she managed to tell us a lot about you Spinelli," Ashley B. grinned, "and you shouldn't be ashamed about it."

"Will you guys leave her alone?" Gretchen uttered, looking nervously around as more students stopped to see what the six girls were talking about.

"Why?" Ashley A. asked sharply, "you were the one who spilled the beans on all of her problems."

"Yeah, like the fact that her entire family is consisted of losers," Ashley Q. said, "with brothers who are too involved with ...,"

"That's enough," Spinelli snapped. She looked about ready to pounce on any and all the Ashley's.

"Spinelli ... don't," Gretchen said, grabbing her friends arm, "this is exactly what they want from you."

"You're right," Spinelli shrugged her shoulders, beginning to walk away with Gretchen following her.

"Of course, her whole family probably ran a drug ring," Ashley A. said loudly, "or several. They definitely had enough brains to try that. Which is, like, none at all."

Spinelli turned around and looked at Ashley A. and said slowly, "what did you just say?"

"Oh, I'm sorry, were you too slow to catch that?" Ashley A. asked, her lip curling, "I mean, it must be a family thing or something."

Spinelli ran and pounced on Ashley A., tackling her to the ground.

"Spinelli! What are you doing?" TJ asked as he joined the group, trying to pull her off of Ashley A.

"Don't touch me Teej!" Spinelli screamed at him, "you don't understand this!"

"Vince!" TJ exclaimed, turning to the other three boys, "we have to separate them."

The four boys jumped in the middle, Vince and TJ pulling Spinelli off of Ashley. Spinelli looked at both of them, then at the gathering crowd and shook out of their arms.

"I'm cool now," she said quietly, then turned to walk away when a voice that she had not wanted to hear came up behind her.

"Spinelli, Ashley A., Ashley B., Ashley Q., Ashley T., Gretchen, Vince, Gus, TJ, and Mikey," the principal thundered, "in my office, now."

"But ...," the Ashley's protested, and one look at the principals face told them that they better stop protesting.

The group quietly filed into the principal's office. Principal Hammand sat down at his desk and looked at each individual student before speaking, "I would like to know what exactly I just witnessed in the hallway."

"If you witnessed it, shouldn't you know what happened?" Spinelli asked, trying to sound innocent. Principal Hammand turned to her, a scowl crossing his face.

"Ashley Spinelli, do I have to remind you of your record?" he asked, obviously trying to hold in his temper.

"I'm pretty sure I have it pretty well in hand," Spinelli assured him.

"Okay, so Ashley B., please tell me what part you had in this," Principal Hammand politely asked, turning to the other girl.

"I had no part in this whatsoever," Ashley B. haughtily said.

"Me either," the rest of the Ashley's replied with her.

"Your nose bleed would suggest otherwise," Gretchen pointed out to Ashley A.

"Shut up Gretchen," Ashley A. snapped at her.

"Okay, look, Vince, TJ, Gus, Mikey, all of you Ashley's besides Ashley A., you are all free to go," the principal dismissed them, "Gretchen, Spinelli, Ashley A., I still need to talk to you."

"Great," Spinelli muttered under her beath as the rest filed out. However, the noise of the rest leaving seemed to drown out her words, either that or the Principal chose to ignore them.

"Ashley Spinelli," Principal Hammand spoke gravely, "you know what I told you last time you got suspended?"

"That I had two days of suspension?" Spinelli ventured, smiling.

"No, well ... yes," Principal Hammand admitted, "but, the other thing that would happen if you got another suspension."

"Hmm ...," Spinelli said, faking as if she couldn't remember, "was it along the lines of throwing a party for most suspensions in the graduating class?"

"Spinelli!" the principal said, as Gretchen glared at her.

"Oh right, you mean the expulsion thing," Spinelli nonchalantly said.

"Spinelli!" Gretchen spoke up this time.

"I'm sorry Ashley Spinelli, but ...," the principal started, but then was interrupted.

"It was my fault," Gretchen quickly said, "she was just trying to defend my honor. I mean ... I tried to hit her, but you know .. I don't have a good aim at all. She only hit Ashley A. once."

"Gretchen ... you do realize what happens if you take the fall for this?" the principal asked her, looking at her seriously.

"I understand that I will get suspended," Gretchen bravely said.

"Ashley A., is that the true story?" the principal asked, turning to her. Ashley looked at each girl, and the expressions on their faces. Spinelli looked so ... uncaring ... while Gretchen looked desperate.

"Yeah, that's exactly what happened," Ashley A. muttered, "I shouldn't have been making fun of Gretchen, I'm sorry."

"That means two days of detention for you Ashley, Spinelli, two days of detention for you, and Gretchen ... two days of suspension for you," Principal Hammand said dismissively.

"Thanks Ashley," Gretchen said as soon as they were out of the office.

"Whatever," Ashley A. rolled her eyes, "I just didn't want that psycho attacking me again."

"You didn't have to do that Gretchen," Spinelli whispered to her as Ashley A. walked off.

"And let you get expelled?" Gretchen raised an eyebrow.

"I would deal," Spinelli shrugged.

"Sorry," Gretchen shrugged back, "it was my fault anyways."

"Yeah, that is true," Spinelli said, smiling at the girl as they walked out the double doors to go home.


	29. So, This is All About Spinelli

Chapter Twenty-Four

So, This Is All About Spinelli

"Spinelli," a voice spoke up as soon as her and Gretchen left the school building. She turned to her right and there stood Vince, Mikey, Gus, and TJ, looking at the girls expectantly.

"Hey guys," Spinelli nonchalantly answered them.

"We need to talk," TJ commanded, "besides, aren't you supposed to be in school right now, both of you?"

"Aren't you guys too?" Gretchen pointed out.

"We have hall passes," Gus said, as each boy held hall passes up.

"For one, this isn't a hallway," Gretchen smiled, "And second, I'm suspended, so I get to go home now!"

"You are what?" Gus asked, bewildered as he wrapped an arm around his girlfriends shoulder.

"But shouldn't Spinelli be the one suspended?" Vince asked.

"If Spinelli got suspended, she would be expelled," TJ said, recalling the meeting where Spinelli had been suspended for skipping too many detentions.

"Yeah, I didn't get expelled," Spinelli shrugged.

"Are you suspended?" Mikey asked.

"Nah, I only have detention," Spinelli said, "Ashley said it was Gretchen's fault, well ... after Gretchen decided to take the blame, and apparently she thought I was going to beat her up again or something weird like that."

"So, you are supposed to be in class right now," TJ concluded.

"Yeah," Spinelli said.

"Then you should probably go so you don't get expelled," Mikey urged her.

"Come on, I'll walk you," TJ said, pulling on her arm, "but, we are talking about this after school."

---

Spinelli looked around at the gang sitting in TJ's living room after school. Gus and Gretchen were sharing the love seat, looking rather comfortable. Her, TJ, and Vince were sitting on the couch, with her in the middle. And Mikey was sitting in the armchair, reclined back and glancing at everybody with an interested expression.

"Okay, Spinelli, spill the beans," TJ demanded, "why did you go all psycho on Ashley A. at lunch?"

"Why do I have to talk about this?" Spinelli asked, sounding a little whiny.

"Because you almost got yourself expelled," TJ said, "because everybody in the entire school seems to know. Because you almost beat Ashley A. to a bloody pulp, if we hadn't pulled you off."

"Fine, fine," Spinelli said grumpily, "it all started with my brothers. Okay, you know Joey and Vinnie right?"

"Yeah," TJ urged her.

"Well ... they both got out of prison and came back here. Vinnie decided to live at home with us, but Joey decided to get his own place," Spinelli continued, "things were great for a while. Joey working at a mechanic shop, Vinnie working in a convenience store, and it seemed like they were really going to clean up their lives. But, about a year after Vinnie arrived and about ten months afer Joey arrived, things started going badly. I mean, I was in eighth grade, so I could kind of tell what was going on. They both started buying a lot of stuff that they wouldn't be able to afford with the jobs they had."

"So, one night I went over to Joey's house to talk to him, because he was always the easiest one to talk to."

_Flashback: Joey's House_

"_Joey, you have to stop this practice of yours," Spinelli tried to urge her brother._

"_Look, stay out of this, you are only in eighth grade, you don't understand anything about it," Joey rolled his eyes at his little sister, "you shouldn't get involved."_

"_We're Spinelli's," Spinelli said, "we always are in each other's business."_

"_Yeah, but you should really stay out of this one," Joey insisted, "you're my favorite sibling, I don't want you to get hurt."_

"_You don't want me to get hurt?" Spinelli raised her eyebrow, "what about you? You're the one who's dealing drugs and being stupid. Why are you even doing this?"_

"_Hello?" Joey said, "My life is already ruined, remember? I've already been to prison once before this. It's not like my hope is bright. One other thing you should know about the Spinelli family little sis, is that we never do anything with our lives."_

"_I plan on doing something great with my life," Spinelli snapped at him and her brother just laugh._

"_That's what we all think," he shook his head, "and do you know how many of us actually succeed? None of us, in fact, mom and dad have it about as good as it gets."_

_Before Spinelli could reply, a knock resounded on the door, Joey quickly ducked behind his couch, dragging Spinelli with him._

"_Be quiet," he hissed at her. A second later they heard the lock click and the door open._

"_The only people who know where my secret key is are you and ...," Joey whispered to Spinelli, but she had already jumped up._

"_Vinnie!" she shouted, sounding rather relieved._

"_Ashley, you're here?" Vinnie asked, sounding rather surprised._

"_Yeah, I was just talking to Joey," Spinelli said, but noticed that Joey hadn't stood up yet, "Joey, what are you doing?"_

"_Ashley, I think you need to leave," Vinnie and Joey both said quietly together as Joey stood up. Spinelli looked between both her brothers and then saw the gun that was in Vinnie's hand._

"_What's going on here?" Spinelli demanded to know._

"_Ashley go!" Joey commanded, "just go."_

"_Fine, fine," Spinelli shook her head, "but, I will figure out what is going on."_

_Spinelli walked out of the apartment and was half way down the street when she heard a gun shot come from Joey's apartment. Without thinking about it, she ran back towards the apartment and walked in the door to see Joey lying on the floor, covered in his own blood and Vinnie no where in sight."_

---

"Wait, Vinnie shot Joey?" TJ asked, shocked. Spinelli had tears streaking down her face.

"I was the witness who threw him in jail," Spinelli whispered hollowly, "my parents were so disappointed in the whole thing. Said all of her kids had turned against the others. To them I was dead after that. They couldn't function anymore. I went to visit Vinnie once in prison a month after his trial was over, a couple months before ninth grade started, and he told me that he had no choice, apparently Joey had stiffed the guy Vinnie worked for on some drug money. That was the last time I talked to Vinnie, a week later, he was murdered in jail."

"How did the Ashley's find out?" TJ asked, "I mean, was it all over the news?"

"Nah," Spinelli shrugged, "we were kind of the poor killing off the poor thing, so people didn't care. The only people I told were Gretchen, Gus, and Mikey."

"And I spilled the beans to everybody in school," Gretchen whispered, "I was so worried about myself, about what kind of future I had, I couldn't help her feel the pain. So, one night I just decided that I couldn't be her friend anymore. It would interfere too much with me. With my future. So, when she came over to ask me to go get some ice cream, I told her everything. I told her she was worthless, that she was going to end up exactly like her brothers, that she was going to be a nobody. Then, I told the Ashley's one day after ninth grade had started. Not even thinking about it, but then it spread around school. The look Spinelli fixed on me after the rumor had gotten back to her was a look of pure murder, and I thought that I had a right to tell anybody about it. Like it had been my own life, not somebody's who I had betrayed. I'm so sorry Spinelli."

"It's okay," Spinelli whispered, tears still streaming down her face, and as she looked around the group, she saw that most of them seemed to have tears in their eyes too, except for Gretchen, who was crying outright.

"Spinelli ...," TJ started, then stopped, then started again, pulling her into a hug, "I'm so sorry. Oh my gosh. So sorry about everything. Your brothers. The mean things I've said to you. You're parents. But, its going to be all right, you have us as a family now."

And as Spinelli let her tears fall, secure in TJ's arms, she knew he was right. These people were her family.


	30. Life Keeps Spinning On, part one

Author's Note: Okay, so I know that its been over a month since I've updated ... but I'm reaching the end of my story and I was having problems figuring out how to write it. So, thanks for reading and I will be starting a new Recess story soon. And sorry if this chapter is not quite up to standards. I'm not very good at endings.

Chapter Twenty-Five

Life Keeps Spinning On, part one

"So, what's the plan for this weekend?" Spinelli asked TJ as they leisurely walked in the direction of his house.

The two weeks following Spinelli's revelation to TJ had been less drama-filled and more everyday life than the ones since TJ's return. The gang had grown closer until they were as comfortable with one another as they had been so long ago in the days of their fourth grade friendship.

"Well, we figured we'd just hang out at my house and watch a couple of movies," TJ shrugged, "you know, nothing much."

"We never do anything much," Spinelli complained, "you are the one who told me that action would start taking place."

"Sorry," TJ laughed at her, "but, if it makes you feel any better we could play, like 'Truth or Dare' or something."

"Because that is so a game that I would enjoy," Spinelli shook her head, "I thought you knew me better than that!"

"Sorry, that's all I got," TJ shook his head, "how about this? We'll watch a scary movie and play I've Never. Of course, we'll be playing I've Never without the alcohol because my parents and kids will be there."

"See, that sounds more decent," Spinelli announced as they arrived at TJ's house, "I'll be over later."

---

"I've never left the state," Mikey proclaimed later that evening. As he watched all his friends drink up their soda pop, he thought about how amusing this game was. They had started off with watching _Friday the 13th_. Gretchen and himself had been very scared during the movie, while the others had been laughing through the whole thing.

"I've never been scared while watching a horror movie," Spinelli spoke up. Gretchen, Mikey, and Gus all drank regretfully to that. The other three smiled at them.

"I've never been part of the popular crowd," Gus offered, shrugging to his girlfriend as TJ and Vince each took a drink.

"I've never had sex!" Gretchen declared, deciding to take the game to a new, interesting level. So far they had been doing the first round "I've Never's" and sticking with the easy stuff that wasn't that entertaining. But, watching this one as TJ, Vince, and Gus all took a drink it was pretty amusing, until she realized that she had just watched her boyfriend take a drink, "you've had sex?"

"Maybe?" Gus ventured, trying to diffuse the argument that he could sense coming, "but, long before we ever started dating."

"I've never been in a relationship where I have been completely whipped," Vince rolled his eyes at the duo, speaking up in time to diffuse the potential debate that was about to take place. But, by the look that Gretchen fixed Gus with, the debate was far from being over. Mikey, Gus, and TJ all drank to this one.

"I've never been suspended," TJ grinned and quirked an eyebrow at the group as Mikey, Gus, Spinelli, and Gretchen all drank to that.

Mikey looked around at the group for a couple of seconds before a smile crossed his face and he said, "I've never had a crush on anybody in our group."

He then watched in satisfaction as Gus and Gretchen drank, obviously referring to one another, but also as TJ, Vince, and Spinelli drank.

"New game time," Gretchen instructed, "how about the 'who have you had a crush on game'."

"I'll pass," Spinelli said at once, standing up to leave.

"The way you act, it would seem as if you still liked the person," Vince teased her.

"Now why would you think that?" Spinelli muttered before hurrying out the door. Gretchen then turned to Vince and hit him.

"Hey! What did I do?" Vince protested the hit.

"Because idiot she does like somebody right now," Gretchen snapped at him, "really Vince, sometimes you fit the dumb jock image."

"Hey!" Vince stood up also, "I guess I'm leaving too. The dumb jock has a big basketball game to practice for."

Vince walked out of the room in a huff, leaving four very uncomfortable teenagers in TJ's house.

"So," Mikey tried to come up with a new topic of conversation, but then TJ stood up.

"I should probably go talk to Spinelli," he muttered, more to himself than any of the others. The others watched as he also left his own home, calling back to his parents, "mom, dad, I'll be back soon. Please watch Al and Vince."

"I'm assuming that if TJ isn't in his home, we probably shouldn't be either," Gus said lightly as the other three stood up, "so, who's up for a game of Parcheesi?"

---

"I figured this is where you would be," TJ brightly said as he sat by Spinelli on a bench facing Third Street School.

"Hey TJ," Spinelli whispered, not even looking up from the ground.

"So, was that enough action for you?" TJ teased her lightly, trying to get her to look up at him.

"Teej ...," Spinelli started to say, but then TJ interrupted.

"I'm sorry," TJ stated, "I shouldn't have tried to make lame jokes. But, seriously, you jetted out of my house so fast, I didn't really get much of a chance to figure out what to say. So, can you at least tell your best friend in the world who you like?"

"Come on TJ, you already know this one," Spinelli finally looked up at him, "please don't make me say it out loud."

"Yeah, I was afraid you were going to say that," TJ said quietly, causing Spinelli to look back down at the ground.

"Hey, look, its okay if you don't like me back," Spinelli smiled weakly at him, getting up from the park bench to hurry off again when TJ grabbed her arm and stopped her, also standing up.

"I'm sorry Spinelli. As much as I wish I could say that I feel this way back and that we should go out sometime. But, I don't want to hurt you. And by me going out with you, I know it would hurt you. And once again, I am really sorry for that, because you are my best friend and I don't want to see you hurting, even for a moment. And to know that I caused you this amount of pain unsettles me even with knowing that I have saved you a lot of pain in the future," TJ rather difficultly spurted out.

"Whatever TJ," Spinelli said, walking away from him with tears streaming down her face. TJ's face looked much the same as hers as tears began to spill down his cheeks.

---

Spinelli stood in front of her mirror, looking at the puffy eyes and red cheeks littered with tear stains that stared back at her. She couldn't believe that TJ had actually found out how she felt. And that he didn't seem to care. The look in his eyes as he told her that he didn't feel the same way were sad and disappointed.

Spinelli then slammed her fist into her mirror, shattering it into a million pieces and cutting her hand. She was definitely as stupid as everybody had always thought she was.

---

TJ stepped back into his house, silent tears still streaming down his face. Why did he tell that to Spinelli? The look on her face right before she ran off would always be imprinted in his mind. She really was his best friend, but he just couldn't have a relationship with her. Because they were friends. Because he had reminders of his past sleeping upstairs.

Because that might make him unfaithful to Lane.


	31. Life Keeps Spinning On, part two

Author's Note: Okay, so here's the finished product of "Back Where He Belongs", which has pretty much been my favorite project for the last few months. I'm so sad its over! I hope you guys enjoy!

Chapter Twenty-Five, part two

Life Keeps Spinning On, part two

Vince took a seat next to Spinelli on the picnic table at the basketball court where they had played quite a few games in the last couple of weeks. She just sat there silently, waiting for him to talk.

"What did you do to your hand?" Vince asked, bewildered as he noticed the ace bandage wrapped around her hand.

"Great way to start a conversation," Spinelli sarcastically told him, not wanting to answer the question.

"Sorry," Vince shrugged, "I came here to apologize for last night. Apparently, I have the whole dumb jock thing down very well. At least that's what Gretchen told me."

"It's okay," Spinelli grinned at him, "he was bound to find out sooner or later."

"So it is TJ?" Vince asked, "because I assumed that it was. But, I also wasn't totally sure."

"Of course its TJ," she shook her head, "but, of course, he doesn't like me back."

"What?" Vince asked, shocked, "are you sure?"

"That's what he told me last night," Spinelli shook her head, "it is kind of hard to mistaken I don't want to hurt you for I like you."

"Weird," Vince muttered. He had known about TJ's crush on Spinelli in grade school. Not to mention the fact that the two had grown so close over the last two weeks it seemed hard to imagine them not becoming a couple.

"Whatever," Spinelli dismissed, "so, what about you? Who did you have a crush on?"

"Well ... that is none of your business," Vince answered, laughing. He then stood up and began to shoot baskets.

"Hey, that's not fair!" Spinelli argued, "I so told you."

"And who's fault is that?" Vince asked, shooting the ball and turning to her mockingly as the ball swished into the net.

---

"So, Griswald, are you going to tell me about this sex you had?" Gretchen asked as the two sat on his couch, watching TV.

"Like I said last night, it was a long time ago," Gus protested, "before you and I were even talking again."

"I can't believe you didn't tell me before this though," Gretchen shook her head, "I thought we were going to be honest with each other, and you don't even tell me about the girls in your past."

"You didn't tell me about the boys in your past either," Gus pointed out.

"There were no boys in my past," Gretchen said, "you were the only one. See, that wasn't so hard, now tell me about your girls."

"Two girls," Gus sighed, "one dumped me for a jock, the other for a guitarist in a band. Not much to tell. Didn't really care about either of them that much, just felt like I needed to be in a relationship."

"So, you had sex because you felt like you needed to be in a relationship?" Gretchen asked, disgusted, "and you didn't really care about the girls? You are a pig."

Gretchen shook her head in disgust, but Gus immediately tried to calm her down.

"Look, I'm sorry," Gus apologized, "I was in that phase of acting out against my dad and it seemed like the right thing to do. I realize now that it was a bit jerky on my part, but I am the one who got dumped in both scenarios. And now I have you, and I do care about you, and you have helped me change a lot."

"I guess," Gretchen reluctantly said, but with a smile, "I'll let this one pass. But, any more secrets from your past like that resurface, we will definitely have more problems."

---

"You've spent everyday for the last two weeks with Ashley Spinelli and you can tell me you feel absolutely nothing for her?" Mikey asked TJ. TJ was playing with his kids on the floor.

"I feel like she's a friend," TJ shortly answered, while tickling Vince.

"And that's all?" Mikey demanded to know, "because the way you two act it seems like a lot more."

"Do you see the two little children right here?" TJ asked, "these are my reminders of my past. I love them to death, but ...,"

"I get it now," Mikey said softly, "you're going to feel as if you are betraying Lane if you love Spinelli."

"That's not it all," TJ said, unconvincingly, "I just ... I don't know."

"Then let me give you a hint," Mikey said, "Ashley Spinelli likes you. You like her, but you're afraid of betraying Lane because of the whole thing. Talk to Spinelli. At least give her your side on the whole issue."

TJ looked away, but he knew his friend was right.

---

"Ashley Spinelli, you are one hard girl to find," TJ said quietly as he stopped behind the girl, who was standing at the graves of her brothers, looking down at the one with Joey's name on it.

"Only when I don't want to be found," Spinelli listlessly replied, turning around to see TJ, "what do you want?"

"Well, you cut right to the chase," TJ laughed nervously, "I came to talk."

"Didn't we do enough of that last night?"Spinelli asked bitterly, "just tell me whatever you need to. I mean, how many ways can you possibly say, 'I don't like you like that.'"

"I'm sorry," TJ blurted out, "I should have handled the whole situation better. Its just ... I have this past. And its right in my living room. I have two reminders everyday of everything that has happened in my life."

"And I don't?" Spinelli laughed, on the verge of psychotically, and gestured to the grave stones, "these are two very real reminders of my past. Or, if you don't like those, go to my house, walk in the door, see my mom sitting on the couch watching some beauty pageant and my dad upstairs, watching wrestling on my tv. They haven't even said ten words to me in the last year. We all have past things we have to deal with TJ. You're the one who taught me that."

"I know," TJ said, regretfully, "but, Lane was pretty much everything to me for so long ... and I feel that if I give that up, if I just move on with my life, then I'm not being true to her, or to my kids, who will never know their mother."

Spinelli's face softened as she spoke up again, "Teej, I don't want to put you in a situation you're uncomfortable with. But don't you think Lane would want you to be happy? It's been over a year and a half."

"But it feels like not enough time has passed," TJ sighed, "Spinelli, I look at you, I see this beautiful girl, this person with a heart of gold that she doesn't like people to see she has. But, I also look at you, and I feel guilty. I want to date somebody else, I want to be with somebody else, and I really want that person to be you ...,"

"But," Spinelli interrupted, "you aren't ready to move on yet."

"I'm sorry," TJ said, looking down at his hands.

"Hey," Spinelli said, putting her hand on TJ's arm, who, for the first time noticed the bandage wrapped around her hand, "I can deal Teej. I know the past is something that is hard to forget. And I am your friend above anything else I am or could possibly be."

"There's the whole heart of gold thing coming out," TJ smiled, wrapping his arm around Spinelli's shoulder and guiding her out of the cemetery, "so, what happened to your hand."

"Stupid mistake," Spinelli shrugged as the two walked in the direction of TJ's house.

TJ looked at the girl for a moment and knew things were going to be all right. Maybe he wasn't ready to move on yet. Maybe he wasn't ready for a new relationship. But, he sure as heck knew that Spinelli was the girl for him, even if it took a little time. He was definitely back where he belonged.


End file.
